


Sanctuary

by pharmtechgirl71



Category: Floating (1997), The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Bonding, Daryl is 26, Finding your sexual identity, First Times, Friendship, Grief, Hurt, M/M, Mentions of past abuse, Percieved rejection and betrayal, Smoking, Traumatizing past events, Undercover Daryl, Van is 20, unintentional suicide attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-11
Updated: 2017-02-23
Packaged: 2018-08-30 09:27:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 32,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8527807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pharmtechgirl71/pseuds/pharmtechgirl71
Summary: Daryl is an undercover police detective. When on a new assignment, he meets someone who captures his attention, and maybe his heart.





	1. A New Assignment

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to jsmith69 for giving me the idea for this fic. She and I share an almost draining obsession with Daryl Dixon paired with Norman's other characters. I emailed her an extremely long list of story ideas and she noticed that I didn't have any involving Van, from the movie Floating (one of Norman's greatest and most emotional roles, in my opinion), and offered me two storylines. You're the greatest Jaime; I love you babe!  
> Please leave some good vibes; we could all use some love right now.

Chapter One

If sanctuary is in your heart  
Then I have none.  
No heart, no home,  
No reason to breath.

My hope fell into the   
Viscus and drown as I tried  
To revive it.  
I grieve for it.

Hope tears at my soul  
And eats alive any  
Expectation for  
Good.

My reflection mocks me,  
It shouts everything that   
I have lost and clouds my  
Brain with waste.

You gave him up,   
But I lost Him.  
The sunshine, the moon,  
The stars and sky.

I barely knew him,  
And he couldn't   
Stay for me.

BLC

**************************************************************************************************************************************

 

Daryl had no sooner sat at his desk, then the chief popped his head in the door. "I need to speak to you in my office Dixon; you got a new assignment."

Daryl took a heavy breath and got back up out of his chair. "Alright; be right there." He stopped in the breakroom to grab some shitty coffee and then knocked on Chief Jones door. 

"Come in," he yelled from behind the door. "Have a seat," Morgan said to Daryl once he was in the room. "You know Sasha, right? You two have worked together before?"

"Yeah," Daryl replied, taking a sip of his shitty coffee. "Been a few years, but yeah."

Sasha Williams was an undercover narcotics officer Daryl had worked with once back in Georgia. She had been on his team trying to get the drug kingpin who owned half of the state; the same man who had killed his brother with an overdose and a bullet in the heart for good measure.

They hadn't seen each other since Phillip Blake was sentenced to death. Daryl enjoyed working with her; she was smart, efficient, and could take out a sniper before he blinked. 

"It's good to see you again Sasha; how have you been?" He asked her.

"Doing good Daryl. You doing okay?" she asked in return.

"As well as I can; my job is my life," he replied and gave her a half smile.

"Alright, now that the pleasantries are taken care of, we have an investigation to discuss." Morgan opened a file that was laying on his desk. "There's been a string of burglaries in the next county, specifically the vacation homes along the lake. In addition to that, the local authorities have reported three recent deaths; all local collage age kids. Cause of death seems to be overdose, but not of any drug they've seen before. They think someone is distributing an experimental drug to their kids."

"Okay," Daryl said. "why don't they use their own undercover? Why bring us in from the next county?"

"Benton County is small, Daryl; you know that. Chief Dillon asked for my help as a favor; he needs operatives that aren't easily recognizable. How often either of you make it out that way?"

The two detectives looked at each other. Daryl had lived here since Blake went to prison, and Sasha was a recent transplant. "I ain't been out of the county since I got here," Daryl answered.

"I just got here two months ago. I still got boxes to unpack and this is the first time I left my neighborhood except to pick up pizza to go," Sasha said as she took a drink of her own coffee.

"Alright then, they want someone who is a virtual stranger; someone who can pose as a tourist on summer vacation. We've rented a house on the lake for you Daryl; you're going to focus on the burglaries. Sasha, you're going to be staying in town; you're going to focus on the drugs. We believe that they are coming in from somewhere on the outskirts. We'll set you up with a job close by so you can keep your eyes on all the comings and goings. We'll have your profiles ready by the end of the day."

Morgan handed each of them a file folder and a manila envelope. "Your undercover profiles will be ready by the end of the day. All the information we have is in these folders; go home and study it. Meet back here tomorrow morning, eight o'clock; you'll start your new lives then."

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Van was lying on the dock soaking up the sun; he had already made his laps around the lake and was letting his muscles relax and cool off. He had been out there all morning long; swimming and doing some stretches and exercises. It had turned out to be a near perfect day for Van; he had gotten out of the house early after getting his dad up, fixing his breakfast, and getting him cleaned and dressed. When he left the house, the man was in his room, working on his toy soldiers.

The only thing that would have made his day better, would be if he had someone to spend it with. All his friends had been away to college since the fall, and although most of them came home over the Christmas holidays, it had been a few months and Van was beginning to feel lonely again. 

Jason and Flip had called him a few days ago saying that they would be back in town this weekend, and although Van wasn't into the same things they were, he would appreciate the company.

He was startled from his thoughts by the sound of a large vehicle approaching on the hill behind him. He jumped up from his spot and climbed up the hill; staying hidden beneath the trees. A fourteen-foot moving truck backed up to the front door of the house behind him, followed by a blue Hyundai Sonata. 

Van stayed hidden in the bushes and watched as an older man with dark, shaggy hair got out of the car and opened the front door. Van was curious as to who was moving into his old house, and peeked his head out from the bush. He could hear the man giving instructions to the movers; they pulled out boxes, chairs, a bedframe, a loveseat, and finally, the most beautiful motorcycle he had ever seen. 

The man with the dark hair wasn't bad to look at either, but Van didn't want to think about that. He was paying attention to motorcycle when he was startled by voice close to his ear.

"You staking out my house? Planning on robbing it later?"

Van jumped five feet into the air. "What! No, no, no! I heard the truck and was curious. It's been a while since someone new moved in, and I guess I wanted to see who you were."

Daryl smiled and laughed. "Relax, I ain't gonna call the cops on ya. Why don't ya come out of hiding? My name's Daryl."

Van stepped out from behind the bush. “Van,” he replied shyly. 

"You live here Van, or you on vacation with your parents?" Daryl asked him as they walked up to the house.

"I live here; on the other side of the lake with my dad. We use to live in this house."

"Really? This looks like great place; how come you sold it?"

"Didn't really have a choice; it’s a long story." Van said in a tone that told Daryl to leave the subject alone.

"Alright then, why don't you give me a tour; show me all the things I need to know." Daryl offered him. 

"Sure, but it's nothing special. Did you rent this place without seeing it first?"

Daryl blushed, embarrassed. "Yeah, I did. A friend of mine from work was up here a few years ago. He didn't rent this particular house, but said that all of them looked nice, so I just took the only one available. Didn't really care what it looked like; I'm just here to relax and do some writing."

"Alright, I'll show you which floorboards creak." Van said laughing, and followed Daryl through the door.

Van hadn't been inside this house since Doug lived here a little over a year ago. He had finally reached the point where he didn't think about his friend every day, and here he was walking back into the house where it all started. 

It wasn't a long tour, but long enough for Van to begin to feel comfortable around Daryl. The man was older than him but not by much; four or five years at the most, but Daryl seemed to be comfortable around him also.

When they walked back outside, Van's eyes took in the motorcycle parked on the lawn, and Daryl caught him staring. "You ride?"

"Yeah, but mine isn't half as nice as yours. I got an old '98 Yamaha V-Max 12K. Bought it a couple years ago off a friend who was moving to Connecticut for college." Van said as he took tentative steps toward the MY16 Triumph Scrambler.

"Those are nice bikes; I had one of those once. It was my first bike when I was fifteen." Daryl walked behind Van as he looked as his bike. "Maybe we can ride together sometime; you could show me around town?"

Van looked back at Daryl and smiled; he had just been given an excuse to see the handsome man again. "I'd like that. Everybody's still at school for another few weeks; it would be nice to have someone to ride with."

Daryl smiled. "Good; it's been a long time since I had the time to ride, much less someone to do it with. Maybe tomorrow sometime we could go out for a while? I got some things I need to do around here; getting unpacked and shit, but I think I'll need a distraction after a few hours. Do you spend a lot of time down here at the lake?"

"As much time as I can. It's real quiet and peaceful here; a good place to think, ya know?"

"Yeah, I used to have a place like that back home. There wasn't a lake there, but it served the same purpose." The two men grew quiet and awkward for a few minutes until Van spoke up. 

"I better get back home; check on my dad, see if he needs anything. I'll be here tomorrow, so anytime you want to go out, let me know."

Daryl extended his hand for Van to shake. "I will. You take it easy; I'll see ya tomorrow."

Van turned and walked back to the dock to collect his things. Daryl watched him as he walked away, and realized that this was going a hard investigation to focus on.


	2. Getting to Know You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl observes Van from afar, and later gets a tour through town.

Chapter Two- Getting to Know You

 

Daryl sat on his front porch overlooking the lake. He was half hidden by the trees, so he wasn't worried about Van seeing him from the dock. He had a sketch book on his lap and he was tapping his pencil against his cheek; his spiral notebook lay on the step below. 

He had originally planned on using his lazy morning to start a new story; he tended to record his assignments on paper, in fictional form. Back at his house in the next county, Daryl had an entire basement filled with boxes and boxes of notebooks, each one accounting every moment he had spent undercover. 

Michael Connelly, he was not. He didn't write his stories from the point of view of an undercover police detective; his hero was a poor schmuck who got caught up in every bad thing he could, but when he saw Van swimming in the lake, shirtless and dripping wet, he had abandoned his story and ran inside to grab his sketchbook.

Van was a beautiful specimen; he was tall and toned, muscular and tight in all the right places. He reminded Daryl a little of Rick, his first boyfriend, except that Rick had dark, curly hair and a beard. They had the same body type, and it was very much Daryl's type.

As he watched Van doing push-ups on the pier, he observed two young men approach him. Van seemed happy to see them and embraced them both. The three men fell into comfortable conversation until he noticed Van's body tense up and his voice get louder. The other two men tried to calm him down, but were unsuccessful and eventually turned away from Van and returned to where they had come from. 

Daryl's curiosity got the best of him and he took his notebooks inside and changed into a pair of board shorts; grabbing a towel he locked up the house and went to the lake for a swim.

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Van could feel Daryl's eyes on him as he tread water in the lake. The shaggy haired man thought he was being discreet, but Van knew this lake, and that house well enough to see him sitting on the front porch. He smiled to himself; he hadn't been able to stop thinking about the new resident, and it made his heart beat faster knowing he was in Daryl’s direct line of sight.

Since he had an audience, Van thought he would put on a show. He swam a few stunted laps where Daryl could see him, and then pulled himself up on the dock to do a few push-ups. When he heard footsteps, he looked up to see Flip and Jason walking toward him.

"I thought you guys wouldn't be back until this weekend." He said to his two friends as he embraced them both in a welcome home hug. 

"Yeah well, things didn't go exactly as planned, ya know." Flip said. 

"They never do, huh?' Van replied.

"I see someone's living in the old homestead. You meet 'em yet?"

"Yeah, he only got here yesterday; seems like an okay guy. He's a writer or something."

"You get a look at his shit? He got anything good?" Jason asked as he lit a smoke.

"You don't touch that house; doesn't matter what he's got. Any other house on the lake is fine, but not that one." Van stood up and advanced on his friends.

"Calm down homie," Jason said. "That little preppie boy don't live there no more, and unless you plan on helping us, it's no concern of yours what house we hit."

"I swear to God Jason, if I find out you hit that house, you'll regret it." Van was infuriated; Doug had nothing to do with any of this. "Just leave, okay." Van turned his back on the other two men and walked back to the edge of the dock.

"Hey man," Flip said. "don't get pissed off. We ain't gonna do nothing, ya know."

Van turned his head to look at them one more time. "Just leave," he said, and dove back into the water. 

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Van was still swimming when Daryl reached the edge of the dock. He didn't announce his presence, just stood and watched the muscles in the other man's back ripple with each stroke. Van noticed him as he turned and swam back to the pier. Propping his forearms on the woods planks under Daryl's feet he looked up at him. 

"Good morning neighbor." Van said as he shielded his eyes from the sun.

Daryl looked down at him and smiled. "Good morning. How's the water?" 

"Nice and cool. Did you come down for a swim old man? Because I'm in the mood to race." 

Daryl laughed. "I'm twenty- six; I'm not old, and if you want to race me, you should be in the mood to lose." He took a running jump off the dock and belly flopped into the lake. Water splashed everywhere and when he resurfaced, Van was on top of him trying to push him back down. 

The two men played around in the water for a while, never realizing how much they were touching each other; they were having too much fun laughing and roughhousing. Finally, when they were tired and breathing heavy Daryl stopped playing around and looked at Van. He had a sweet smile on his face and mischief in his eyes. 

"Last one to the shore is a rotten egg," he said and took off. Daryl was startled at first, but soon caught up with Van, and ended up beating him by ten seconds.

"Fuck me!" Van exclaimed as he broke through the surface of the water. "Damn you're fast."

"Hey, I'm just as surprised as you are. I haven't raced since high school." Daryl said climbing onto the dock. 

"You were on the swim team in high school?" Van asked in awe. "Our team was state champions three years in a row. I got the record for the two-hundred-meter freestyle at our high school. No one around here has ever been able to beat me," he laughed to himself. "until now."

"Our school never won no championships, but I held a couple school records while I was there. The one-hundred-meter backstroke and the two-hundred-meter butterfly. I think some kid already beat 'em though."

"That don't matter; I'm sure mine'll be a memory soon enough." Van replied. 

Daryl grabbed his towel and began to dry off. "Did you bring a towel?" He asked Van, who shook his head. "Come up to the house; I got one you can have. Do you still want to go on that ride?"

"Yeah, haven't been out on the bike for a while. I've been looking forward to it since you mentioned it yesterday."

"Me too; with my schedule I don't ever have time to go out." Daryl held the door open for Van and both men went inside. Van followed him through to the bathroom where Daryl took two large towels from a box in front of the tub. "Give me a minute to dry off and change clothes, then I'll ride you down to your house to do the same." 

Van ran the towel across his back and chest, then over his wet head. "That's okay. If I leave now, I can be ready to go by the time you get there."

"I'm practically ready to go now, so you might as well wait. It's no problem Van, I don't mind hauling your ass around the lake." Daryl said, smiling. 

"If you insist," Van replied with a smirk on his face. "I'll just wait outside for you."

Daryl went into the bedroom once he heard the front door close; he rummaged through a couple of boxes before he found his black jeans and his favorite band tee. Merle's favorite band had been AC/DC and saw them every chance he could; Daryl had kept every concert tee that was salvageable.

When he walked out the door, Van was sitting in the very chair Daryl had been relaxing in earlier. "Alright, let's go. You'll have to tell me how to get there."

Van followed Daryl down the steps to the shed where he had parked both the motorcycle and his Sonata. Van watched as Daryl climbed on and started the engine. He slowly backed out of the shed and stopped in front of Van; handing him a helmet, he scooted up so Van could get on behind him.

Van hadn't thought this far ahead and now was worried about being so close to Daryl; where in the hell was he going to put his arms and hands? He got on behind Daryl, but kept his arms at his sides. "Ya gotta hold on Van; I don't want you flying into the lake." Van wrapped his arms around Daryl's midsection and settled in.

Daryl flew through the streets; it wasn't far from his house to Van's, but he enjoyed every second. He hadn't smiled like this in a very long time; he wasn't sure if it was the freedom of being on the bike again, or having Van so close to him. He had forgotten how good it felt to have someone's arms wrapped around him.

Van was grinning like an idiot inside the helmet he was wearing. He had never ridden with someone on their motorcycle before; never had his arms wrapped around someone while the wind pushed against his body. He loved the feeling of flying, but it felt even better now having someone with him.

Van touched Daryl's shoulder as they approached his street, and Daryl slowed down and pulled to the side. "I'll get off here and walk the rest of the way. I'll change and get the bike, then meet you back here."

"I can drive you up to the door, I don't mind." Daryl said as Van climbed off.

"Thanks, but my dad's probably sleeping. I don't want the bike to wake him. I'll walk mine till I'm out of earshot; it won't take long." Van took off running down the street and Daryl watched as he turned into a driveway at the end of the road. 

Daryl moved the bike up the street slowly when he heard yelling coming from the house Van went into. He couldn't understand what was being said, but could tell it wasn't good. When Van stormed out and Daryl heard the screen door slam, he moved the bike back to its original spot and watched Van start it and head his way.

"Think you can keep up?" Van said as he pulled up next to Daryl. 

Daryl didn't mention that he had heard the arguing, but noticed the look on Van's face. He didn't look pissed off, just tired and defeated. "Lead the way," was all he said, and followed Van into town. 

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Thirty minutes later, Daryl and Van were making their last trip around the square. Van had taken him all over town, slowing down occasionally to show him where the restaurants, shops, and grocery store was. 

They parked in front of the Lakeside Diner on Main. There were quite a few people milling around the streets and a few of them waved at Van and said 'hi'. The bell above the door chimed as they walked in and Van grabbed two menus from the hostess' station. 

Daryl followed him to a booth in the corner and sat opposite the young man. Van handed him a menu and smirked. "Order whatever you want; it's on me. Consider it your prize for beating me earlier." 

"No, I can't let you do that." Daryl said, shaking his head. "I got this; consider it a thank you for the escort around town."

The waitress came by to take their drink orders, then left them to look at the menu. Van already knew what he wanted; he ordered the same thing every time he came here. He spent what little time they had before the waitress returned looking at Daryl over his menu.

Van was captivated by Daryl's eyes; they were blue like the waters of the Caribbean Sea. His shoulders were strong and broad, and his biceps rippled as he flexed. He briefly thought of Doug; the only gay man he had ever known. Van often wondered if he had loved Doug; loved him like two men love each other, but he always dismissed those thoughts as a fluke. 

Van assumed it was the concept of being gay that had been his fascination with Doug; they had been genuine friends first, but after he found out, he had thought about it a lot. Now that he had met Daryl, he was thinking it may not have been a fluke.

The waitress returned with their drinks and took their lunch orders. Another silence fell on them until Daryl spoke. "So, you live with your parents?"

"Just my dad; my mom left us a few years ago. He's sick, so I take care of him."

Daryl knew what it was like to lose his mom and get stuck with a father who was sick. "I'm sorry to hear that, Van. Is that why you're not at school?"

"I don't think I'd be in school even if my dad was healthy. It's not my thing, ya know. Never liked it. Did you go to college?"

Daryl laughed. "My grades were shit. I'm lucky they let me graduate from high school; college was never in the cards for me. So, what do you do around here? Do you have a job?"

The waitress came back with their sandwiches just in time. Van didn't want Daryl to think he was a pathetic, pot smoker, even though he was. "I do some odd jobs for some of the shop keepers when they need shit done, and offer swimming lessons to the kids whose parents drag them out here in the summer."

"That's cool," Daryl said as he took a bite of his sandwich. "You get a lot of little kids out here?"

"Oh yeah. Last year I had about ten total; on and off during the whole summer. I like it; the kids are a lot of fun."

They spent the rest of the time eating in silence until they were full. Daryl stole the check away from Van and paid the bill. As they walked out the door, Daryl ran straight into a body; he grabbed the pretty, African American woman by the arm to keep her from falling.

"I'm so sorry, ma'am. Are you alright?" He asked Sasha.

"I'm just fine, thank you. I just moved here and was too busy looking around trying to find out where everything is to notice you two coming. I'm the one whose sorry." 

"I just moved here too. You should find someone to give you a tour, like I did." He said as he nodded in Van's direction.

"I will certainly be on the lookout for one of those," she said and laughed. "This is a small town, I'm sure I'll see you two again. It was nice running into you."

Daryl and Van watched Sasha continue down the street. "She's pretty," Van said quietly. She looked like she could have been Daryl’s type, and he saw the way he looked at her.

"Yeah, she is." Daryl agreed, looking directly at Van. "But I've seen prettier."


	3. On the Job

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl does some investigating, and reports in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posting today because it's going to be a busy week. Happy Thanksgiving!!

Chapter Three- On the Job

 

Later that night, Daryl finally realized that he had no food in the house. It was seven o'clock at night and he was starving. He had been going over case files since getting back from his afternoon ride with Van, and spent some time on the phone with Sasha. She was trying to establish herself downtown and was looking to get a job at one of the antique shops on the main drag.

She slyly asked about Van; who he was and where Daryl met him. The detective gave her only the basics; the house originally belonged to Van's family, he met him at the lake, and he loves riding. Sasha caught a certain inflection in Daryl's voice when he talked about Van, but didn't call him on it.

The first time his stomach growled, he ignored it. He was deep in thought; the image of Van on the dock with those two men was running through his head. He wondered what they argued about; he wondered if Van, or either of the other two knew about the burglaries around the lake. 

Finally, when he started feeling light headed, he put down the file and grabbed his keys. He thought about going back to the restaurant, but knew he'd need food in the house later, so he drove to the grocery store. 

Pulling into the parking lot, he noticed a group of people hanging out under one of the street lights on the far end. As he walked to the door, he noticed that one of them was Van; he was with the two men from earlier and a few girls. Daryl could smell the pot from where he was, but didn't go into cop mode; he had a million tokes under his belt by the time he was Van's age and he wasn't there for a pot bust anyway.

Daryl was sure the group couldn't see from where they were, so he hung out by the front doors smoking a cigarette for a while. There was a lot of yelling and laughing; just kids having a good time. When Daryl finished his smoke, he crushed it under his boot and turned to go inside, but was stopped by the sound of Van shouting.

He was yelling at one of the girls; he reached out for her arm, but she flinched and stepped back. That enraged the young man even more and his voice boomed at her. Daryl watched as he turned and walked away in a rage. He wanted to get in the car and pick him up; find out what happened, but he couldn't. He barely knew him. Van wouldn't confide in him, yet.

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Daryl was on autopilot as he threw random groceries in his basket. He wasn't paying attention to where he was going and ran head on into another cart. The older couple who were driving it said everything was alright, but Daryl apologized profusely.

"I wasn't paying attention; I'm sorry. I didn't damage anything, did I?"

"No, son. Everything's fine; don't worry about it." The old man said and smiled.

"I haven't seen you around; are you new in town?" his wife inquired.

"Yes ma'am. I'm renting one of the houses on the lake."

"Oh, we live on the lake as well. How long have you been here?" the woman asked him.

"I moved in yesterday; forgot the fridge was empty."

"Well, you haven't had time to meet any of your neighbors then? Why don't you join us for movie night? Every Thursday night we show old home movies of what life was like here back in the day. It's so much fun, and you'll get to meet everyone. You should join us." Marjorie told him.

"Thank you very much ma'am; I'll think about it. My name's Daryl, by the way."

"It's a pleasure to meet you Daryl. My name's Paul, this is my wife Marjorie. We've lived on that lake for forty years."

"It's a beautiful lake, and I've only been here for one day, but I'm already in love with it."

“Thank you, Daryl, it was wonderful to meet you," Marjorie said. "We hope to see you on Thursday."

"I wouldn't miss it ma'am."

**************************************************************************************************************************************

When Daryl returned to the house, he was hoping to find Van on the dock, but he wasn't there. He was worried about him and wondered what happened that could have made him so angry. He hoped Van was somewhere safe.

After putting the groceries up, he heated up a frozen pizza and grabbed a beer. Daryl sat at the kitchen table and took his phone out; he needed to call Morgan and report in. 

The chief picked up after the third ring. "Hey Morgan, it's Daryl."

"Hello Detective. How's your vacation at the lake?"

"Good so far; I've found a couple persons of interest regarding the burglaries already. Couple of local kids looks like."

"Kids?" Morgan asked. "How old are these kids?"

"I'd say between eighteen and twenty-two." Daryl guessed.

"Dixon, those aren't kids; they are legal adults, and they'll do serious jail time if their found guilty."

"They're assholes from what I can tell. Anyway, I'm gonna keep an eye on them; follow them around a bit." The timer on the stove went off and Daryl went to get his pizza.

"Sounds good. I hear you've already made a new friend." Morgan said with a smirk in his voice.

"I guess you've talked to Sasha, then." Daryl huffed.

"This afternoon; she said you found someone to escort you around town."

"I met him yesterday; his family used to live in the house y'all are renting. He rides, so we went out together today and he showed me around; that's all. He knows the two guys I'm looking at for these burglaries, so I'm hoping he can help me out." 

"Are you sure that's all, Dixon?" Morgan said with a chuckle.

"Stop it. I'm gonna do my job; that's what I'm here for, not to have fun."

"That's right, but making friends will get you where you need to go with this investigation; just be careful, Daryl."

"Morgan, he's straight. There's no way anything is gonna happen with him. I wouldn't do anything to jeopardize the investigation, you know that."

"I do Daryl. You're one of the best undercover officers’ I have, and I trust you to perform your duties. Now eat your pizza and get some sleep."

"How the hell you know I'm eating pizza?" Daryl asked, shocked.

"I've known you for three years; I don't think I've ever seen you eat anything other than pizza." Morgan replied, laughing.

"Alright smartass. You enjoy your raw fish and I'll talk to you later."


	4. Lazy Morning Interview

Chapter Four- Lazy Morning Interview

 

The sun shone too bright the next morning when Daryl turned over in his bed. He closed his eyes tight and buried his face in the pillow. He laid there for a few minutes hoping to fall back to sleep, but it wasn't going to happen. 

He climbed out of bed and went to the kitchen to turn on the coffee pot, then took a quick shower. When he was dressed, he went to pour him some coffee and stood at the front window looking out at the lake. He couldn't see Van on the pier, but could see splashing in the lake. He poured another cup of coffee and walked down to the water.

"Brought you a cup of coffee if you're interested." Daryl said as Van broke through the surface of the lake.

Van turned around at the sound of Daryl's voice and accidentally splashed him. "Coffee sounds amazing!" he replied and pulled himself up onto the dock. "Sorry I splashed you; you startled me."

"It's okay, I just got out of the shower and ain't even completely dry yet. You want to come in and have some breakfast. I went to the store last night and bought actual food."

"Yeah, man. That sounds good; I've worked up an appetite." Van followed Daryl up the dock and to the house. Daryl handed him a towel that he had sat across the chair.

"You know how to cook? I can make a few things, but I burn a lot of shit." Daryl said and laughed. 

"So, you asked me to have breakfast with you so I could cook for you?" Van asked, feigning shock. "I make two-hundred a week as a personal chef." he deadpanned. 

"Well, how much do you charge for lessons, because I'm not sure if I can afford you." Daryl replied as he took a carton of eggs and a package of bacon out of the refrigerator.

"I think an arrangement could be made," Van said, and winked at Daryl before he realized what he had done.

If Daryl caught his implication, he didn't remark on it. He showed Van where the mixing bowls and pans were and they made breakfast together. 

It was a simple meal; poached eggs and toast with bacon. Daryl had been put in charge of the bacon, and with Van's supervision it came out perfectly crisp, and not burnt at all. As they ate, Daryl kept thinking about what he had seen in the parking lot last night, and dared bring it up in conversation. 

"I saw you at the store last night; those all your friends?" He asked carefully, trying to convey that he was only curious and not prying into Van's personal business.

Van didn't look at him in response, only began to pick at the food on his plate, "Yeah, I suppose so. We grew up together here on the lake. Most of them went off to college and are starting to come home for the summer."

"Must be nice to see them again; I bet it's pretty boring around here in the off season."

"Hmm," was Van's answer. "How much did you see?"

"Not much, just noticed y'all talking, laughing, and smoking. Don't worry; I ain't gonna tell nobody about that last part. Saw ya talking to that pretty brunette; is she your girlfriend?"

Van scoffed. "Julie? No, she's not my girlfriend. We fucked around a little in high school and then last summer when she came home from school, but now she's got her a little preppy boyfriend whose taking her to his parent's beach house. The only reason she's here is to pack a bag."

"Sorry to hear that." Daryl said. "I'm sure there are a lot more girls around here."

"I'm sure there are," Van replied and finished his food. He rinsed his plate off and put it in the dishwasher. 

Eager to change the subject now, Daryl thought he'd find out if Van knew anything about his case. "Oh, I met a couple last night. I ran into their grocery cart; Paul and Marjorie. They seem real nice; she said something about some robberies they've have up here."

Van smiled when Daryl mentioned their names. "They're good people; lived here since before I was born. Their friends with my dad. I used to mow their grass when I was a kid."

"So, have there been a lot of robberies around here? Should I double bolt the door?"

Van sighed. "Every summer a few of the rental houses are broken into. It's never been too big of a deal; petty theft kinda thing."

"Has this house ever been broken into?" Daryl asked him.

"Once, when the last family lived here. That's been over a year ago; I heard they had some pieces of art stolen."

"What have the police done?" Daryl got up and put his own plate in the washer and filled their coffee cups again.

"Not much; they'll come out, take statements, take pictures, but they don't ever recover any of the stolen stuff. Most of these rich people got insurance to take care of it anyway."

"Yeah, I suppose they would," Daryl replies. "So, what are your plans for today?"

"I don't know. I thought I'd spend some time with my dad; I need to take him to the grocery store and I told him I'd take him to the hobby shop. Then I'll probably hang out with Jason and Flip; they’re my friends, you probably saw them last night."

Daryl assumed they were the two men he saw Van arguing with the previous morning. "Sounds good. I'll probably hang out here today. Maybe do some writing and drawing."

"Are you a famous writer?" Van asked. He wasn't much of a reader, but he knew that there had been a few writers vacation in this area before.

"No," Daryl said laughing. "I always wanted to be a writer, but I'm not that good. I just have all these ideas in my head and write them down. It drives me crazy to have all that shit floating around up there and can't get it out."

"That's really cool." Van was looking at Daryl with admiration. He had always wished for that kind of talent. "You draw too? Do you paint or sculpt or anything?"

"I just stick to pencil drawings; sketches and stuff like that. Been doing it since I was a kid. My mom taught me and after she died, my brother would buy me sketchbooks and all kinds of pencils and markers. He wanted me to be as good as her someday."

Van was surprised that Daryl would tell him something so personal, and it made him feel sad. He knew what it was like to lose a mother. "Sorry about your mom." He said quietly.

"I was real little when it happened; it don't matter anymore." 

Silence stretched out before them and neither man spoke for quite a while. Van didn't want to leave, he wanted to stay with Daryl, talk a little more, but he felt that Daryl had closed himself off. "I guess I should head out. Dad will be expecting to go out soon."

Daryl was sad that Van was leaving, but imagined that the other man felt uncomfortable now after how the conversation had turned. "Alright. Maybe we could go for a swim or a ride tomorrow if you've got time."

"I'll make time," Van replied softly. "Thanks for the breakfast and coffee. If you want cooking lessons, let me know. I won't charge you." He smiled sweetly at Daryl, and got one in return. 

Daryl watched him walk down to the dock and collect his things, then disappear into the woods. He was in too deep already, and shook his head so he could focus on something other than the handsome man he was falling for.

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Sasha arrived at Daryl's house after sunset; they had agreed that his house was the best place to meet since it was hidden away and no one would become suspicious seeing them together. She had just finished her first day of work at the antique shop and wanted to go over her notes and thoughts regarding the investigation with Daryl. 

He was busy cooking dinner when she arrived, and the house was filled with delicious smells. She assumed he had picked up something from the restaurant and brought it home for them; the one and only time she had eaten Daryl's cooking, she had spent the entire next day hovering over the toilet. 

"Oh good lord, Dixon. You are not my beneficiary; why would you want to kill me?"

"I ain't gonna kill you, Sasha. It's fucking spaghetti; can't fuck that up too much." He said with fake distain.

"What is that amazing smell? I'm sure it's nothing you've done."

"Do you want to eat smartass, or do you want to starve? One of my neighbors gave me a jar of homemade sauce. I met her and her husband last night and she came by today to bring me a fucking goody basket, and this was in it. It's why I decided to make spaghetti; she's Italian, so it's gotta be good."

"I'd be shocked as shit if it isn't. I haven't smelled anything this good since I visited my brother in New York."

"Do me a favor," Daryl said, annoyed. "Grab the plates and silverware out of the cabinet and make yourself useful." He waited until he heard the clank of the dishes before speaking again. "How was your first day on the job?"

"Boring as fuck. The only people who shop for antiques are old people and pretentious tourists. I think you got the easy part of this assignment. All you have to do is lay out by the lake and look at pretty boys."

"Sasha," he said in a reprimanding voice, "don't start that shit. I already got it from Morgan last night, okay. Van is straight, and wouldn't want me like that anyway. Let's just eat and get this over with. I'm fucking tired and I know you are too."

"I'm never too tired to tease, Detective; I though you knew that by now." She said and laughed. 

Daryl only growled at her and sat a bowl of spaghetti and sauce in front of her. They ate and discussed what they had discovered so far, which wasn't much. Daryl told her about Flip and Jason; what he had seen and what Van had told him. He also told her about Van's reaction when Daryl had asked him about the burglaries. She wrote everything down in her notes and promised to keep an eye out for them around town.

She told Daryl that she had spoken to a lot of the local folks today; it seems that when they found out she was new in town, all they wanted to do was talk about their lovely home. None of the people she encountered were suspicious, but she had the feeling that a few of them were uncomfortable when she started asking questions. 

When dinner was over and all the dishes put into the washer, they each grabbed a beer and went outside to the porch. There was a full moon hovering in the sky and reflected off the water with a brilliant light. It was the only thing that kept them from complete darkness. They sat in the deck chairs hidden on the side of the porch; Daryl had moved them there earlier in the day to ensure that Van wouldn't catch him peeping as he swam in the mornings. 

"There they are Sasha," Daryl said as he saw Flip, Jason, and Van sitting on the dock, smoking weed and drinking beer.

"The two you're looking at for the burglaries?"

"Yeah. I don't have any evidence yet, but I got a lot of suspicion."

"Their friends of Van? You think he's involved too?"

Daryl sighed. "Honestly? No, I don't. He doesn't seem like the type; I know that don't mean shit, but I don't think it's his kind of thing."

"Alright Dixon, I trust your judgement, but I don't want you to get hurt if he is a part of this."

"Don't worry about me Sasha. I've had a lot worse things than that happen to me and I'm still standing. I'll be fine no matter what happens."

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Van was sitting on the dock facing Daryl's house. He had been thinking about the man all day long. His father had caught him zoning out during the day and called him on it every time. Van had done everything for that man today and couldn't take it anymore, so when he put him to bed, he snuck out to Flip's place and come to the dock with him and Jason; they were just getting high and shooting the shit.

Van hadn't noticed the new car sitting in front of Daryl's place, but he could now see the man on his porch, clear as day, and he was talking to that pretty, black girl they had run into in town. He didn't know why it bothered him; Daryl could spend time with whoever the fuck he wanted, but his insides gnawed at him like they would eat him alive.

"Hey! Van! You fucking listening to me?" Jason shouted.

"Yeah man, sorry. I just zoned out; been doing that all day apparently."

"You have another fight with your old man?" Flip asked.

"Not really; he's just being his regular asshole self. I just can't clear my mind and I don't even know what's in it."

"You know the Horvath's are outta town for a month. They went down to Florida to visit their nieces. The house is nice and empty. Why don't you go down with us and help us check it out?" Jason suggested.

Van thought back to what Daryl had asked him about that morning, and about Jason and Flip wanting to rob his house. "I'll go," Daryl said, "on one condition. If I do this with you, you promise me you stay away from that house." he said and pointed up at Daryl's place.

"You got it homie, and just to prove I ain't bitter about losing out on that, I'll let you keep whatever you find tonight."

Van thought that was a pretty square deal and followed his friends off the pier; he glanced back at Daryl as they left and felt a little betrayed.


	5. Resurrection of the Past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl and Van clear the air about a few things.

Chapter Five- Resurrection of the Past

 

Daryl was going stir crazy; he had spent all morning and most of the afternoon looking up information on the burglaries. He had been online and on the phone with the local police department; they agreed to let him come in and speak to the officers who had been on the scene at each reported robbery. He was going to meet with the officers the next day and was preparing an interview.

It was getting hot in the house too. He had all the windows open, but there was barely any breeze coming through, so he decided to go down to the lake and take a swim to cool off. He was surprised to find that Van wasn't there. Daryl was disappointed, but thought that maybe he was with his father, or doing some work in town, so he jumped in the water and started doing laps.

After thirty minutes, Daryl was exhausted. He swam back to the dock and jumped up. Sitting there alone, he looked out at the lake; he thought about Van and how much fun it had been playing around with him a few days ago; he thought about how much he wished the other man was there with him. 

He was lost in his own thoughts when he heard some rustling behind him. Looking back, he didn't see anything, and assumed it may have been a bird or an animal, so he ignored it. Less than two minutes later, he heard it again and decided to check it out. As he walked back up the dock toward the house, he saw movement in the bushes by the house.

Ignoring whoever was there, he continued up to the porch and sat down. "Why are you hiding? Afraid I'll ask you to make lunch for me?"

Van peeked his head out of the bush. "No, just not in the mood to be around anyone. Saw you coming down to the dock, so I hid."

"Did something happen? Did I do something?" Daryl asked. He couldn't think of a damn thing that he had done that would make Van want to avoid him.

"No, I'm just tired and not in a very good mood; just want to be alone." 

"At least come out from the bushes." Daryl pleaded. "Come inside; I'll make lunch. I can slap shit between two slices of bread, ya know. Won't have to worry about burning nothing, and we can talk if you want. I'm a good listener, and I don't tell everything I know. You can trust me."

Van stepped out and onto the porch. "There isn't anything to talk about, but I'll have lunch with you. I'd rather not go inside though; could I stay out here and wait?"

Daryl was concerned and worried about what was going on with Van, but he agreed to let him sit outside and wait. He worked as fast as he could, putting together two ham and cheese sandwiches with potato chips and a couple of beers. When he returned, Van was sitting in the same chair Sasha had been in last night. "Here ya go," Daryl said and handed him a plate and a bottle. 

"How's your dad? He okay?"

Van sighed as he took a swig of his beer. "He's fine; same asshole he always is. He's not gonna be getting out of bed today, so I don't have to worry about him."

"Why ain't he getting out of bed? He getting worse?" Daryl asked.

"No, can't get any worse; he's just feeling all kinds of sorry for himself. Just wants attention and pity, and I stopped giving him that a long time ago."

"Okay then, what is it? Are you in trouble? I can help you if you need it. We're friends, right?"

Van took a bite of his sandwich to buy him some time. "I don't need your help. You can't do anything for me. This is my shit to deal with, but thanks; not a lot of people want to help me."

They sat in silence, eating their lunch. Daryl was running scenarios in his head trying to figure out what was going on with Van, until the other man's voice interrupted his thoughts. 

"When I was little, and still lived in this house, I loved sitting right in this spot. It has a great view of the lake, and I thought it was a good hiding place. Thought that I could see them, but they couldn't see me; I was wrong."

Daryl tried to figure out what was the most important part of that statement, so he could get to the point Van was trying to make. "Wrong about what?"

"The kids at the lake. When I was real little, they used to make fun of me. I didn't learn to swim until I was ten; all the other kids would swim around and play and I couldn't. I'd sit here and watch them, wish I was down there with them, and I could hear them laughing at me. Eventually, I realized that they saw me up here, watching them. Now that I spend more time in that lake than I do anywhere else, I know it's true. This place has a great view of the lake, but the lake has a great view of this spot."

Daryl didn't know what to say. He understood what Van was saying, but he didn't know what it meant. "So, you've seen me up here. What are you trying to say?"

Van didn't say anything, just sat his empty plate on the ground and drank the last of his beer. "I've seen you watching me. I saw you the other morning, when Flip and Jason were here. I saw you last night with the pretty, black lady we met in town that day. You sure do move fast; I admire that. I lost the only girl I've ever been with because she found someone with money who can give her all the shit she wants, and you're here two days and already hooked up."

"We didn't hook up; it's not like that. I went to the antique store yesterday; I got a friend whose birthday is next month and she's into that shit, so I thought I'd look for a present. She was working there and helped me find something for her. We started talking and I invited her over for dinner. We ate, we talked; that's it. I'm not interested in having a relationship with her. You'll find somebody. Stop thinking about it and stop looking for it, then you'll find her."

Van didn't want to find anyone; he needed to though. He needed someone to fuck; no relationship, no feelings, just fucking. He needed to re-direct his thoughts; away from Daryl and away from all the confusion that he caused. 

"So why don't you want to come into the house all of a sudden? You were just here yesterday morning; what changed?" Daryl asked, watching Van closely.

Van didn't answer right away. He had been thinking about Doug a lot since he met Daryl and he didn't want to relive those memories anymore. "The family that lived here before you; I was friends with their son, Doug. He was my age and he was a swimmer too. We started hanging out, got close."

He paused and looked at Daryl, who was intently returning his gaze. "He and his dad didn't get along; Doug wasn't good enough for him, but for some reason he liked me. He was a swim coach at the university and offered me a scholarship. I felt bad about how he treated Doug and refused. Things kept building up and Doug told me he was gay. He knew his dad would disown him, so he kept it quiet."

Van had never told anyone the whole story regarding him and Doug. His friend had asked him to keep his secret and he had, even after his death. Doug was the first person, first friend that he had lost like that and it still tortured him.

"Doug couldn't take it anymore; got real depressed. He and I planned to get out of town together; start new lives, so we set up a house to rob so we would have some money." He looked down at the ground and shook his head. "We almost got caught, so we ran. We'd both been smoking and drinking so we were a little out of it. We ran into the lake to hide, but he couldn't orient himself and drown."

"I guess I've been thinking about him a lot lately, since you moved in. I thought I could walk back into that house like nothing happened, but I can't. I'm sorry." Van slumped forward in his chair and covered his face with his hands; his body spasmed as he sobbed. Daryl slowly rose from his seat and knelt on the hard boards beneath them.

He took Van's hands in his own and moved them away from his face. His streaming eyes were red and puffy, and he wouldn't look at Daryl.

"Van, I'm so sorry that happened. Neither one of y’all deserved any of that, but not coming into this house isn't going to make it go away. This was your house once, and even though I'm living in it now, doesn't mean that you should try to forget what happened here. When I went back home, I wanted to burn the place down, but I didn't. Those memories I had were what drove me to be the man I am now. All that hurt you're feeling, changed your life and put you on a path you won't see coming."

Daryl placed his finger on Van's chin and lifted his face to meet his. "I'm here, whenever you want to get away from things, or talk, or swim, or ride. I'll help you as much as I can. You're an amazing man and I'm happy that I got to meet you. I'm your friend and you can trust me."

He pulled Van up by his arms and crashed their bodies together in a tight hug. The other man wrapped his arm around Daryl instinctively and held him as close he could get. Van's mind went blank; he felt warm in Daryl's arms and wondered if he would have felt the same surrounded by Doug.

He suddenly had to get away, and broke the embrace. Pushing Daryl aside, he ran down to the dock and swam to the other side of the lake.


	6. A New Lead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl witnesses something interesting, and has a flashback to his first relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short one to bring some life into the investigation.

Chapter Six- A New Lead

 

Daryl lay in bed that night thinking about Van. He hadn't been able to get the man out of his head since he had run away from him earlier that afternoon. He had tried to work on the case, but his mind wouldn't let him. He hadn't counted on a complication like this; he was here to investigate a string of burglaries and a drug ring, not get involved with a local.

He wanted so badly to talk to Sasha, but he couldn't. Van had trusted him and he wasn't going to spill his secret or his pain to anyone else. He knew pain like Van had; losing Merle the way he did, growing up without a mother and a sick father who didn't have a fuck to give. His story about Doug, finding out his friend was gay and how his father treated him, it was familiar too. 

Daryl had been seventeen when he realized that his suspicions about himself were true. He had been hauled in by the police, along with his brother. He hadn't broken the law, but had been guilty by association. The cop that interviewed him had been a rookie named Rick Grimes. He had soft eyes and hard set jawline. After Daryl had been released, Rick had given him a ride home. Ironically, after that day, Daryl seemed to see the rookie everywhere he went. 

After two weeks of being followed, Daryl approached him angrily and demanded an explanation. He got one in the form of a spontaneous, heated kiss. He was shocked and confused, and in anger pushed Rick away from him and onto the ground. He ran as fast as he could to the garage his brother worked at. Merle had questioned him for being out of breath, but Daryl only told him that he had seen the cop that arrested them and thought it best to not be around.

For weeks Daryl thought about that kiss, he avoided being in town or anywhere that cop had seen him. He wanted to be disgusted by Rick, the kiss, and how his dick had twitched when he felt Rick's lips on his, but he wasn’t. He needed to know why the rookie had been following him, and why the fuck he would want to kiss him. 

One night after Merle had left to go to the whore house, or meth house, he walked to the police station and calmly asked to speak to speak to Officer Rick Grimes. He waited patiently and when he saw the man walk out in his uniform, Daryl's dick twitched again. Rick escorted him out and around the side of the building where they could talk in private. 

Once out of sight, Rick took his mouth passionately. Daryl struggled to keep up and eventually gave up the struggle and let Rick kiss him his way. After, they talked; Rick told Daryl that he had been completely captivated by him and couldn't get him out of his mind. He only asked Daryl to give him a chance, and Daryl agreed to that. He wanted to find out what these feeling were, and why he was having them. That night, after Rick's shift ended, the two men ended up naked in Daryl's bed.

Six months later, Rick broke the news that he was getting married, and Daryl's heart broke. Gratefully, when he got home that night, drunk and barely able to stand, Merle announced that they were leaving town; he felt relieved that he wouldn't have to worry about running into Rick and his wife, and never saw the man again.

Daryl often thought about the irony of the situation; that he would later become a cop too, but didn't dwell on it. He had gone into law enforcement to help his brother, not relive his first failed relationship. 

He couldn't assume that Doug had been the first gay man Van had ever known, but it seemed likely. Van hadn't alluded to any animosity on his part toward his gay friend, in fact they had grown closer it seemed. Daryl wondered if the two had a relationship that moved beyond friends, but would never ask; Van would tell him if it was something Daryl needed to know.

Perhaps they had developed feelings for each other and never had the chance to admit them? Daryl didn't know, and wouldn't find out anytime soon; he also wouldn't be falling asleep any time soon. He got out of bed and put his clothes back on; grabbing his keys, he locked up and got in his car. 

Downtown was deserted, as expected, but Daryl kept his eyes out for anything unusual. He didn't want to think about Van anymore, so he went into undercover cop mode. The street lights were bright enough to guide his way, so he drove through the streets without his car lights on. He drove through the alleyway behind the antique store and slammed on his breaks when he turned the corner.

Jason, Flip, and Van were leaning against the side of a building across the street, smoking under the street light. Everything seemed fine, but Daryl turned the car off and watched them. They were just laughing and smoking, not a big deal, but even from this distance he could tell that Van's laugh was purely for his friend's sake. 

He must have sat there for an hour before the Civic pulled up in front of the antique store. The driver flashed his lights twice, then exited the vehicle. Walking across the street, he began talking to the three men sitting on the curb. Daryl took out his phone and began recording the scene as best he could, considering his distance and lack of good light. 

Flip and Jason stood and shook the man's hand while talking to him. Van remained sitting on the ground and didn't seem to acknowledge the stranger who had approached them. Soon the two men followed the new arrival to his car across the street, and the mystery man popped the trunk. 

Daryl watched as the they leaned over the open space; he spared a glance at Van and saw that he hadn't moved a muscle except to take another toke. By the time he looked back at the car, the two young men were stuffing something in their jacket and pants pockets and walking back across the street. The mysterious new comer got back in the car and drove away.

Whatever the man had given them, they tried to give some to Van, but it was obvious he refused. Daryl could hear a few heated words, but it never transpired into a full-blown argument. They hung around long enough to finish their smoke, and then Van stood to leave; he was walking away before the other two knew he was gone and they ran to catch up with him.

Daryl stayed in his car until he was sure they were gone and stopped recording. He knew Sasha would be asleep, but he had to let her know about what he had seen. He sent her a text telling her about seeing Jason, Flip, and the mystery man. He described the new suspect and told her what he had seen them do. Never once did he mention that Van had been there the whole time.


	7. Getting to Know All About You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl and Van share secrets.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this is so late. I've been watching a friend's two year old, and I can't bounce back like I could seven years ago. Anyway, I hope you like this chapter. Let me know what you think.

Daryl was sitting shirtless on his front porch. He was used to southern, summer heat; the humidity in the south could be deadly, and his body had learned to adjust to it, but the heat in New England was something special. He assumed there would be a breeze coming from the lake, but he was oh so wrong. 

Sasha had received his message when she woke up and tried to call him, but he was asleep. After he had gotten home this morning, he had crashed on the bed in his clothes and slept till noon. 

He made coffee and took a shower before he checked his phone and decided that since Sasha had waited this long for him to return her call, she could wait until he could fix something to eat. He still had some spaghetti and sauce left from the other night, so he warmed it up and took it outside with his phone in his pocket and his sketchbook under his arm.

Luckily, Sasha was on her lunch break when he called, so they had thirty minutes to discuss the new information. She had been keeping her eyes out for the Civic and the driver based on Daryl's description, but hadn't seen either yet. Daryl said he would send her and Morgan both copies of the video he took in hopes of identifying the mystery man. 

As they were talking, he saw Van coming down the road out of the woods. He didn't look in Daryl's direction, only continued until he came to the end of the dock. Daryl watched him take his shirt off and do a few stretches and push-ups before diving in. He zoned out and Sasha was yelling at him from the other end of the phone.

"Daryl, you better get your mind on your work. We have a serious lead here; this could be the guy we're looking for."

"I know that! Why do you think I told you about what I saw? I know that’s your end of the investigation, but it looks like my guys might be involved with your guy."

"What is up your ass Dixon? You have a fight with your boyfriend?"

"Goddammit Sasha. He's not my boyfriend. He saw us the other night on the porch; he asked me if we hooked up."

"What did you tell him?" She asked curiously.

"I told him that it wasn't like that. I gave him this story about seeing you at the antique store and asking you to dinner. He just got dumped by this chick he'd been banging and he was a little upset. I think he was jealous that I've been here less than a week and already met someone."

"Whose he jealous of exactly, you for meeting me, or me for being at your house?" She asked.

"It doesn't matter. He's got a lot of shit he's dealing with right now; I want to help him, but I don't want him to think I used him for the investigation." 

"I can't tell you how to handle this one, Dixon. I'll just say good luck to ya, and let you go. I'm gonna try to find this man on your video."

"Alright, give me a call if you find something." Daryl hung up the phone and took out his sketch pad. He could fill up an entire book with image of Van, and he already had three that he had started. Today, Van was warming up on the pier; some jumping jacks, push-ups, and sit-ups. Daryl quickly outlined a drawing of the man and walked down to the water to say hello.

They looked at each other for a solid minute before Daryl took the initiative. "How are you? You doing okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," Van said and smiled. "Thanks for yesterday. I guess I just needed someone who would listen. It means a lot. I'm sorry I ran off like that."

Daryl hummed to himself and sat crossed-legged on the dock. He sat his closed sketchbook next to him and slid his pencil behind his ear. "It's alright; I understand. I think we have more in common than you think."

Van cocked his head to the side and studied Daryl's face. "Can I ask you a question? You don't have to answer if you don't want to."

"Sure, I'll answer if I can." Daryl said.

Van sat cross-legged next to him and sighed. "Where are you from? It's obvious you're not from around here."

Daryl smiled. "Uh, no. I was born in Georgia; a little Podunk town southeast of Atlanta. The population was about three hundred, give or take."

"How did you get out? Was it hard? What did your family say about it?"

"It wasn't hard at all. I just bought a bus ticket and got the fuck out. My family didn't have shit to say about it because they were all gone by that time. After my brother died, I didn't have anything keeping me there. I came up north because it was as far away from home as I could get on what little money I had."

"Shit Daryl, I didn't mean to bring up bad memories or anything." Van felt horrible for having asked. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry; I don't mind telling you. We lived in a shack in the woods. My daddy made moonshine and sold it. He gambled most of the money away, but eventually started drinking more than he was selling. I had to hunt if I wanted to eat; my brother taught me how to kill it, skin and gut it, and cook it." 

"Momma was the only person who ever gave a shit about me, but she was only allowed to do so much when daddy was around. I was an accident and he never believed I was his. He took that out my me and momma both. She was beautiful though; pale skin, long, blonde hair, and a bright smile. I've got one picture of me and her together; a neighbor took it when I was five and always kept it with me in my pocket, thank God."

Van's mom had blonde hair too, and he caught a hint of a smile on Daryl's face when he mentioned his mother. "Anyway, she died when I was seven or eight. She smoked and drank to numb the pain I guess; passed out in bed with a lit cigarette. That's what they told us anyway, turns out it was arson. My daddy got two of his buddies to set the fire; I was supposed to be there too, but at the last minute she sent me out to the store for more smokes."

"He ended up going to prison; was killed on the inside. My brother was seven years older than me, and practically raised me after that; when he wasn't in juvie. He got heavy into drugs and went to jail a few times, but I could fend for myself by then. After I got out of high school, we started moving around, town to town; didn't stay anywhere to long. He overdosed about a year later. Didn't have anything keeping me in Georgia after that, so I left."

Van was astonished at Daryl's story; it made his problems seem petty, and now he felt like a fool. "I don't know what to say, Daryl. I'm so sorry. Now I feel stupid."

"I didn't tell you all that for you to feel stupid; you're not stupid. I just want you to know that I understand wanting to get away from people who bring you down. Your dad is sick; I don't know what kind of sick he is, but I know you're responsible for taking care of him. I also gather from what you've said that your mom isn't in the picture." Van nodded his head.

"I want you to know, that I know what it's like to have to take care of someone who's sick." Daryl continued. "I'm sure my daddy and brother weren't the kind of sick your dad is, but the responsibilities are the same, and that's hard for someone just wants to be free from it all. My whole life I was never free until Merle died. I miss him, but I'm happier; I can finally be who I am."

Van had never known anyone who could relate to being trapped the way he was. He could have gone to college, he could have had a scholarship, but couldn't go because of his dad. He was bitter and angry; watching everyone else leave and experience life filled him with jealousy. "My dad was in a car accident when I was sixteen; he's paraplegic. He couldn't work anymore and we had a lot of medical bills. My mom got used to living a certain way, ya know."

Van became quiet; everyone at the damn lake new about what had happened with his family. He still suffered the pitying looks of his neighbors, and the kids he hung with. He and Julie had started having sex around that time; she felt sorry for him too, he assumed.

"Anyway, she left in the middle of the night; took every cent we had. That's why we had to move, we couldn't afford the house anymore. My dad, he's always feeling sorry for himself. He's always blaming himself or me; I do every damn thing for him. I cook for him, I clean him, dress him. All he does is lay in bed, or paint his damn toy soldiers. He won't let me leave. He says that if I leave, I'm no better than my mom, abandoning him."

Daryl sighed and put his hand on Van's knee. "My brother used to make me feel guilty whenever I'd tell him that I wanted more than just following him around. He always said "blood is blood", and "ain't nobody gonna love you but me, little brother". But I did find someone who loved me, at least for a little while. Merle never knew, but this man helped me realize that I wasn't what my family said I was. I wouldn't be who I am if I hadn't met Rick."

Van blinked; did Daryl just come out to him?


	8. Movie Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl goes to movie night at Van's house, and gets to meet his father.

"Rick?" Van asked. He didn't know what to think; on one hand, his heart leapt in his chest, but he tried to ignore that. On the other hand, Daryl was gay, and the culmination of his relationship with Doug slapped him in the face.

"Yeah, I'm gay. I wasn't going to tell you, but after you told me about Doug, I didn't think it would bother you." Daryl said. "I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable; I won't put the moves on you." Unless you want me to, Daryl thought.

"It doesn't bother me at all," Van replied. "I never would have thought that though. Seeing you with that woman the other night . . .I just never would have thought that."

"Her name is Sasha, and I told you it wasn't like that. She's nice and we have some things in common; that's all. I never really had a lot of friends growing up, and now that I have a few, I like the feeling."

Van hummed his agreement. He had plenty of friends until his mom left and took everything they had. After that, most of his friends around the lake didn't want to associate with the poor kid.

"Doug was the first real friend I'd had in years. He didn't give a shit if I had money or not, or if I had a good family. He liked me for who I was. We swam together, rode together, and he actually talked to me like I mattered. No one was ever interested in me before; we spent a lot of nights here at the dock, talking about shit; we spilled our guts to each other like teenage girls." Van hung his head and sighed. "I liked him a lot."

"I thought I loved Julie, ya know. I thought that's what love was, but we were just using each other because we were both willing to do it. She never accepted me for who I was, but I didn't care; I was getting laid, ya know?"

"I understand." Daryl said. "Rick, he made me feel loved for the first time in my life. He really knew how to sell that shit, but turns out he was just using me to sow his wild oats before he got married. It hurt a lot when I realized it, but I think he did love me, in his own way. He treated me good while we was together; convinced me that I was worth something, that I was worth being loved. Sounds like that was what Doug did for you."

"I don't know; I started having feelings for him. I thought it was friendship; I hadn't ever felt that close to anyone before him, but now I'm not sure. I think I loved him, but I never got the chance to find out. I haven't been able to stop thinking about that. I don't know what to do with it; what if I loved him? What if he loved me? What the fuck does all that mean?"

Van was getting agitated, and Daryl tried to calm him down. He put his arms around Van's shoulders and pulled him closer, resting the other man's head on his shoulder. "There is no way you're ever gonna know for sure if he loved you, but you made him feel comfortable enough to come out to you; he trusted you with that, and that's hard to do, especially if his dad was the way you say he was. Trust like that doesn't come easy; you earned that. He had to have loved you to share that part of him with you."

Van was sniffling on Daryl's shoulder. "I think I was in love with him," he said quietly, and after a long silence, spoke again. "Would you stay here with me for a while?" He asked.

"Yeah, Van. I'll stay with you."

********************************************************************************************************************************************************

Daryl and Van remained on the dock for a couple of hours. They didn't say much after that, but Daryl held him close for as long as Van would let him. 

Eventually, Van pulled away. It was early afternoon, but he said he had some things to do for his dad. Daryl let him go; his heart hurt thinking that Van had come so close to feeling loved, and it was taken away from him.

Daryl received a call from Marjorie later that day asking if he was still coming to movie night. He said yes, that he was looking forward to it, and the older woman offered for her and Paul to pick him up since he still didn't know his way around the lake just yet. He accepted her offer and went to shower and get ready.

An hour later the older couple pulled into the driveway and Daryl brought them into the house.

"There are a lot of memories in this house," Paul said as he sat at the kitchen table. "This was a very happy home at one time."

"Van told me a little bit about what happened, but not everything I'm sure." Daryl sat down next to the old man and made conversation with him in an attempt to gain more insight into who Van was.

"Van is a wonderful young man," Marjorie added. "Despite everything he's been through and dealing with, he takes good care of his father."

"He told me his dad was sick and that his mom left because of it. I know what that's like; I had to take care of my dad and brother."

Paul straightened up in his chair and leaned closer to Daryl. "His dad doesn't treat him right. He can't take care of himself and doesn't appreciate all the things that boy does for him."

Marjorie looked at her watch and cleared her throat. "We should get going. You'll get to meet Van's father tonight; they're hosting the movie."

********************************************************************************************************************************************************

Ten minutes later, Paul parked in front of Van's house. Daryl recognized it from before, but had never seen it up close. He held the door open for Paul and Marjorie and then came in behind them. There was already a house full of people there, sitting up chairs and loading the projector. Daryl saw a man in a wheelchair sitting alone in the corner watching everything around him.

Paul nudged his shoulder and crooked his finger at Daryl to follow him. He followed him to the other side of the room where Van's dad was parked. "Hello Richard, how have you been?" Paul asked as he shook the man's hand.

"Same as always, Paul. Shit don't change around here." Van's father replied and looked at Daryl. "Who the hell is this?"

"This is Daryl; he's renting your old house." Paul replied.

Daryl extended his hand for the other man to shake, but Richard just looked at him. "It's a pleasure to meet you, sir."

Richard huffed. "Van told me someone was staying there. Better keep an eye on your shit; that boy and his druggie friends will rip you off."

Daryl didn't respond to the man's accusations, just smiled wearily. "Thank you for allowing me into your home."

He walked away then, hoping to find Van around somewhere. Wandering into the kitchen, he found him, bent over and taking something out of the oven. Daryl didn't want to startle him, so he leaned against the door jam and watched him.

Van sat the baking sheet on the stove and turned off the oven; taking off his oven mitts, he turned around and saw Daryl. "I didn't know you were coming to this."

Daryl could see the exhaustion in Van's eyes, and his heart hurt again. "Paul and Marjorie invited me; they picked me up at the house and I rode here with them."

"So, I assume you met my dad?" He asked, pulling a large serving plate from the cabinet.

"Paul introduced us. He seems . . . nice?"

Van laughed. "He's not nice, and you know that. All you have to do is look at him and know he's a miserable fuck."

Daryl hummed and smiled at Van. "Do you need any help? Tell me what I can do."

Van didn't need any help, but he wasn't going to say no to spending time with Daryl. "Grab this plate and those spoons and forks on the counter. I got a table set up in the living room, just sit everything there."

Daryl did what Van asked and then returned to the kitchen. Van was stacking Solo cups and getting drinks out of the refrigerator. "Could you grab the crock pot? I got the drinks and cups, all we'll need after that are the plates. There's a stack of paper ones in the pantry."

Whatever was in the crock pot smelled amazing. The spread Van had set up was impressive. There were three plates of snacks and appetizers, two plates of sandwiches, a fruit and veggie plate, and chili in the crock pot. After they had everything set up, the two men went out back to smoke a cigarette.

"Did you make all of that yourself?" Daryl asked him.

"I made the sandwiches, and the chili. The fruit and veggies I got at the store along with most of the appetizers. I didn't have time to do everything, so I took some short cuts."

"Do you always make that much food?" Daryl asked.

"When it's our turn. Everybody takes turns hosting; this is our week. I always do the set up and the cooking. Luckily, some people got here a little early to help me out."

"There seems to be a lot of good people live around here," Daryl said as snuck a glance at Van.

"They tried to help us out after mom left, but dad wouldn't let them. I'm surprised they still talk to the bastard, but they give him the pity he wants, so he does these movie nights with them."

Van threw down his smoke and crushed it, then turned to walk away. 

"Aren't you staying for the movie?" Daryl asked.

"No, I can't watch them. My mom is in them and I can't see that."

Daryl was disappointed. "Are you going to the lake?"

"Yeah, thought I'd get in a few laps tonight. Nothing else to do," Van said, avoiding Daryl's eyes.

"Could you wait for me? We can swim, or talk, or whatever you want when I get back."

Van grinned. "Yeah, I can do that. I'll see ya later."

********************************************************************************************************************************************************

Two hours later, Paul and Marjorie drove Daryl back to his house; his arms full of Van's leftovers. Van was sitting on Daryl's porch, in the hiding chair drinking a beer and smoking a joint. "I gotta put all this shit in the fridge, then I'll be right back."

"I stopped and got us some beer; it's down on the dock." Van said as Daryl went inside.

"Alright then, let's go," Daryl replied as he came back outside. They walked together, side by side; Daryl resisting the urge to reach out for Van's hand.

"How was your first movie night?" Van asked as he sat at the edge of the dock and stuck his bare feet in the water.

"Not as bad as I thought, but I won't be going back. No offence." Daryl said and laughed. He took a seat next to the man and plunged his toes into the cool lake.

"None taken; I don't show up anymore either. I'm sorry if my dad was rude to you, he's an asshole most of the time."

"I noticed," Daryl said. "I wish there was a way to help him." 

Van took two beers out and gave one to Daryl. "He doesn't want help; he wants pity and I can't give him that anymore. I just want to have my own life."

Van continued to talk, and drink. Daryl watched him with awe and fascination, and listened to the lilt of his voice as he talked about his father, his mother, and how trapped he felt. He just wanted to be free and swim the ocean. Van kept drinking and eventually lit another joint. 

After a few more drinks, Van was an inch away from shitfaced. Daryl had a few beers himself, but not nearly as many as Van did. He was worried about the other man; his despondency and fear, in addition to the drinking was driving him to the edge. 

When Van stood up, Daryl stood with him. Van took off his shirt, shoes and socks. "I need a swim, Daryl. Why don't you come with me? It's a beautiful night."

When he took off his pants, Daryl did the same. He rushed to get the rest of his clothes off before Van jumped in, and moved quickly to grab him as he dove. Both men went into the lake, but Daryl lost his barely tangible grasp on Van as they hit the water.

Daryl broke the surface and gasped for breath. He looked around, but couldn't see Van anywhere. Diving back under, he blindly reached out into the deep darkness, hoping to grasp onto the other man. Suddenly he felt Van's body near his and wrapped his arm around his chest, swimming up toward the surface of the lake.


	9. Don't Do What He Did

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl saves Van's life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a relatively short chapter, but these two get to the point pretty quickly. ;)

Chapter Nine- Don’t Do What He Did

 

Daryl swam to the surface of the lake and laid Van on the dock. Jumping up beside him, Daryl began performing CPR. He prayed as he pressed Van’s chest and breathed air into the younger man's lungs. He cried as he begged Van to come back.

"Don't die Van, please! You can't die! Not like this! Not like him!" Daryl didn't stop, wouldn't stop until Van woke up or someone physically pulled him away. It seemed as if half the night passed before Van began spitting up lake water, and Daryl jumped back as Van sat straight up and puked up the entire lake. 

The moment Van fell back onto the dock and his breath evened out, Daryl rushed to his side. He had tears in his eyes as he looked down at the pale man, and in his relief, and without thinking, Daryl leaned down and kissed him. 

It was more passionate than he expected, but he couldn't control himself. He nearly lost the first person that had made him feel anything in years. Van allowed Daryl to move their lips together, but he did not kiss him back. He barely knew what was happening, but he knew it felt better than drowning.

Daryl lifted Van into his arms and carried him up the dock and into the house, where he laid him on the bed. Van's eyes were closed, and he didn't speak; Daryl watched him lying there and touched his cheek. Slow tears fell from Van's eyes when he opened them and looked at Daryl.

"I'm so sorry," he cried. "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry." He kept saying it over and over again. Daryl pulled him up and wrapped his arms around him; Van buried his face in Daryl's neck. "You saved me. I couldn't save him, but you saved me."

Daryl lifted Van's head and cupped his face. "No, Van. You are not going to blame yourself for Doug's death. He had no hope; he thought he had nothing to live for. He gave up, but you didn't. You have something to live for, Van; if you want it."

Daryl saw something in Van's eyes he had never seen from another person. It could have been relief, or appreciation, but it seemed like something more. "Kiss me again," Van whispered as he looked directly into Daryl's eyes.

This time, the kiss was slow and sweet. Their lips touched gently, and when Daryl slid his tongue across Van's lips, the younger man opened his mouth to him freely. 

Van was shy with his kiss, and let Daryl take the lead. He moaned into Daryl's mouth as their tongues swirled around each other's. "I don't know what I would've done if you hadn't come back," Daryl said as their lips parted.

"I didn't want to die, Daryl," Van said. "I just didn't know what else to do. I want to forget about Doug and my dad. can you help me forget?" Van touched Daryl's chest, and moved his fingers against his skin.

Daryl laid his forehead against Van's. "I will do anything for you; tell me what you want."

"Touch me," Van said quietly.

Daryl shook his head in disbelief. He wanted Van more than he'd ever wanted anyone else; even more than Rick. When he met Rick, he didn't know what he knew now. He didn't know anything about relationships, love, or men. Van was right there; where he was back then, and Daryl didn't want Van to get hurt like he had.

Daryl knew it would be wrong to touch Van; he had already lied to him and would have to keep lying until the investigation was over. He knew Van would hate him when this was over, but Daryl was selfish, and wanted to touch him.

Daryl kissed Van again and laid him back on the bed. His lips caressed his jaw and neck, sucking lightly on the skin as his hand roamed his chest and body. Both men were moaning and Van laid blissfully still as Daryl worshipped him; thoughts of Doug and his father far away. All he could feel was the weight of Daryl on top of him and his mind was blank.

Daryl's lips and hands worked their way down Van's body; he brushed his thumbs over Van's nipples, and the younger man shivered under his touch. It made Daryl feel powerful, and he kissed and licked his way down Van's chest and rib cage. 

Van's rock hard member lay against his stomach and Daryl gently moved the tips of his fingers up and down the length. Van's breath hitched and he begged Daryl to keep going. "I won't stop sweetheart," he replied. "I want to make you feel good; I want to help you forget."

Van's mind was blown wide; he had never been touched or kissed like this, and the emotions he was feeling and the emotions he felt coming from Daryl were too much. He had always taken the lead with Julie; he initiated every encounter, and she had made him feel like a man. He had done everything for her; pleased her in every way he knew how, and as much as she enjoyed the things he did to her, she did not physically reciprocate.

His nerve endings were on fire. Every kiss, lick, and touch sent him barreling toward the most powerful orgasm he ever had. Daryl's featherlight touch on his cock became a taut grip, and his hand moved along the length, sweeping his thumb across the slit and spreading precum from tip to base. Van could feel his balls draw up and his body convulsed as he came hard all over Daryl's hand and his own stomach.

Daryl continued to stroke him through his orgasm and gently licked the tip of his cock, then down the length to clean him. Van had slung one arm across his face covering his eyes, and his chest heaved to regulate his breathing and heart rate. 

Daryl moved to Van's side and placed a hand on the other man's chest. "How do you feel?"

Van moved his arm and looked up at Daryl. "I feel like I'm dreaming." He reached out and cradled Daryl's cheek in his palm. "I've never felt anything as amazing at that in my life. Thank you."

Daryl snuggled into Van's side and pulled him closer. "You don't ever have to be afraid. You have so much to live for, and I want you to take advantage of everything that life can give you. And I would love to be a part of that life for as long as I can."


	10. Getting to Like You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after

Chapter Ten- Getting to Like You

 

Daryl woke up with his face buried in Van's back, and his arms holding him tight; the other man was still sleeping and snoring softly. Daryl softly kissed the skin at the nape of Van's neck and breathed him in. Thinking back on the night before, Daryl realized that he had never been as scared as he was when Van slipped under the water and didn't come back up. Even losing Merle hadn't scared him that bad.

He faintly heard the vibration of his phone sitting on the dresser, and carefully pulled himself away. By the time he reached his phone, it had stopped ringing. Looking at the caller ID, he saw that it had been Sasha calling. Daryl took one last look at Van sleeping in his bed, and quietly threw on a pair of pajama pants and a tee shirt, and left the room.

Daryl remembered that their clothes were still laying on the dock, and walked down to get them. Just seeing them lying there brought back the previous night’s horror in excruciating detail. Suddenly, he could feel the water around him, the panic that swept through his body, and the relief when Van was breathing again.

When he got back to the house, he put their clothes in the washing machine, started the coffee pot, and dialed Sasha's number; she picked up after the second ring. "Morning Dixon. Did I wake you up?"

He mumbled something incoherent into the phone and stared at the coffee pot, willing the inanimate object to work faster. "Are you okay? Did something happen?" she asked.

"Had a bad night," he said, then paused. "Had a really good night too."

"I should probably ask for details, but there isn't time. I called to let you know that I found the identity of the man in the video. His name is Caesar Martinez, he has priors for drug manufacturing and distribution, aggravated rape of a minor, and second degree murder. He's been all over the country; his last known location was Alexandria, Virginia where he's wanted for the murder of a politician's son."

"Dammit!" Daryl exclaimed as he filled his cup and stepped outside to the porch. "Do you know where he is now? Where does he run his operation from?"

"That, I don't know. Do you think Van knows anything about it? I saw him on the video."

Daryl sighed; he hadn't noticed that Van's image had been in the video, but he did glance at the other man quite a bit, so the camera could have shifted. "He ain't involved in the drugs, Sasha. If you saw him on the video, you know he didn't even give this Martinez a second glance. He may know something about the burglaries, but I think that getting this guy on the drugs is more important right now. All Van does is smoke a little pot, that ain't never killed no one."

"I understand that Daryl, but if he's friends with the other two, he might know something whether he's involved or not. You know, as well as I do, that morons like those guys can't keep their mouths shut. They probably talk about shit when Van is around and if he's paying attention, he will have information."

"I'm not going to fucking use him, Sasha. He deserves better than that. You have no idea what's going on in his life and I am not going to do anything to bring more shit down on him," Daryl said angrily.

"Calm down, Daryl. I didn't say anything like that." Sasha paused before continuing. "You care about him, don't you?"

"God fucking help me, I do. I also know that when he finds out who I am and what I'm doing here, he's gonna hate me, but I can't stand the thought of losing him. I've only known him for a week, Sasha, but I think I'm falling in love with him."

Everything was silent between them after that; Sasha was at a loss at what to say that would comfort her friend. Daryl was on the verge of tears; he was experiencing emotions that he hadn't felt in years.

"I don't know what to tell you, except that you should savor the time you have together and make sure he knows how you feel. When the shit hits the fan, it might not be as bad as you think."

"Thanks, Sasha. I'm gonna try as hard as I can," Daryl said softly.

"I have to leave for work; could you call Morgan and tell him what I found? See if he can get an arrest warrant and we'll do some surveillance."

"Yeah, of course. I'll give him a call right now. I'll let you know what he says."

"Good," she replied. "Daryl, if you love him, and he loves you, you'll be together regardless of who you are and why you're here."

**************************************************************************************************************************************

After Daryl ended his call with Sasha, he crept back to the bedroom to check on Van. He was still snoring softly and Daryl didn't want to wake him; he knew that Van needed to rest and recuperate from the night before, so he closed the door quietly and went to start breakfast and call Morgan.

The Chief was happy to hear from him; they hadn't communicated with each other in a couple of days, and he was eager to discuss the video that Daryl had sent him. As they discussed what could be seen on the video and Daryl's additional commentary on the details, Daryl moved the clothes from the washer to the dryer and made waffle mix.

Morgan agreed to contact one of the local judges for an arrest warrant and the local police to update them on the investigation and see if they had any information that could help their case. The captain told Daryl he would contact him regarding the warrant and what time they would be meeting the judge.

Once they hung up, Daryl took bacon, eggs, and a can of biscuits from the refrigerator and started making breakfast. His heart was thrumming with excitement over what had happened between him and Van, and despite the inevitable outcome of the investigation, he had never been happier in his life.

**************************************************************************************************************************************

When Van opened his eyes, he didn't know where he was at first, then he recognized the room he had spent his childhood in. He smiled as he remembered his night with Daryl and what happened between them in this very bed. He turned over slowly, hoping to see Daryl's beautiful, blue eyes, but they weren't there.

He heard noises downstairs and Daryl's voice. Van moved his body to the other side of the bed and felt the warm sheets where Daryl had laid. Wrapping his arms around Daryl's pillow, he inhaled the scent of the man who had saved his life. 

He could still feel Daryl's lips on his skin, and his hand on his cock. He was having a hard time believing it was real, but he knew it was. He had spent the night in Daryl's bed with the man's arms wrapped around him. His heart felt like it was going to beat right out of his body, but doubt creeped in like he knew it would.

He knew he was being stupid; doubting that Daryl had been sincere with his words and actions, but it was an automatic reaction. Van didn't know what the hell was going on; he didn't know anything about proper relationships. What he had with Julie was casual fucking; no feelings involved, but he already had feelings for Daryl.

Daryl was a tourist though; only here for a few weeks at the most. Van wanted to revel in his newfound discovery and make what time they had together the greatest memories he would ever have. It would hurt when Daryl left, but maybe Van could convince him to stay, or at least continue their relationship once he went back home.

The smell of coffee and bacon made Van's stomach growl, and he slowly rolled out of bed. Realizing that his clothes were still down at the dock, he looked through Daryl's dresser until he found a pair of pajama pants and a tee shirt to wear; he didn't think Daryl would care, since his own clothes were in the same pile on the dock as Van's were. 

He followed the delicious smells into the kitchen where Daryl was setting the table and plating up the food. "Good morning," Van said sleepily.

Daryl was startled by Van's soft voice, and almost dropped the plate of waffles he was carrying. "Good morning. You scared the shit outta me; you're too quiet."

Van chuckled. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. I'm still half asleep. Something smells good though; I thought you couldn't cook?"

Now it was Daryl's turn to chuckle. "The bacon is burnt, and the eggs are a little runny, but the biscuits are fluffy and the waffles are golden crispy. The last two were easy, the biscuits came out of a can and the waffle iron has a timer on it."

Daryl sat a plate and a cup of coffee in front of Van and then sat down next to him. "I went down to the pier and got our clothes; I washed 'em and they're in the dryer right now." He watched as Van filled his plate and became lost in the fluidity of his movements. Daryl almost felt pathetic because he had fallen in love so quickly, but the elation he felt last night with Van in his arms quickly quelled his negative emotions. 

"You look good in my clothes, ya know." Van blushed when he saw how intently Daryl was looking at him. "How are you feeling? Better, I hope."

Van ducked his head shyly and blushed; a rush of heat ran through his body thinking about how good Daryl had made him feel last night. 

"I feel amazing," he said quietly, looking down at his plate. "I feel like everything is different now."

Daryl lifted Van's chin to get his attention. "Things are different, Van. What happened between us last night was special. I haven't touched anyone in a long time, and I'm glad that you let me show you how important you are to me. Anything you want or need, I'm here for you. I'll always be right beside you when you need someone. Don't ever forget that."

Van was overwhelmed, but not by sadness or guilt. This time he was overwhelmed by love and happiness. He saw the honesty in Daryl's eyes and leaned forward to take the man's lips in a chaste kiss. Van would never get tired of the taste of Daryl's mouth and the softness of his eyes when he looked at him. 

When they parted, they smiled shyly at each other and went back to their breakfast. "Do you have any plans today?" Daryl asked.

"I don't know yet. I'm pretty sure my dad is gonna be pissed when he sees me 'cause I was out all night, but I don't give a fuck. He'll probably have something for me to do today; he always does. I might hang out with Flip and Jason later, or swim, or something. What are you doing?"

Daryl hesitated before he spoke. He would have to lie again, and it made his stomach turn. "An old friend of mine called earlier; invited me to lunch this afternoon. He lives in the next town over, so I might be gone most of the day."

Van was disappointed, but tried not to let Daryl see it. "That's cool; I'll probably be busy all day too. Maybe we could see each other tonight?"

"I'd love to see you tonight. If I get back in time, we could meet at the pier and go for a swim, if you want to?"

Van gave Daryl a toothy smile. "I always want to swim, and I always want to see you."

The dryer buzzed, indicating that their clothes were done. When their plates were clean, Daryl loaded them into the dishwasher. "You can take a shower, if you want to," he said as he handed Van his clothes.

"I'll just put these back on and shower when I get home, but thanks." Van took his clothes and turned to go back to the bedroom when Daryl took him by the arm.

"I meant everything I've said to you. You mean everything to me, and I hope that last night meant something to you too." Daryl pulled him close and ran his fingers through Van's hair. Daryl kissed him hard, and ran his tongue along the seam of Van's lips. When Van opened his mouth, Daryl dove in, twisting their tongues together. Van sighed into the kiss, and held onto Daryl like a lifeline.

When they parted, breathless, Daryl leaned his forehead against Van's. "Please be careful today. I don't ever want anything bad to happen to you, especially when I'm not here to take care of you."

"You don't have to worry about that, Daryl. I can't imagine doing anything that would risk never seeing you again. I have hope now, thanks to you."


	11. Getting to Hope You Like Me

Chapter Eleven- Getting to Hope You Like Me

 

Daryl arrived at the police station in the early afternoon. Sasha was already there, having told her boss that she had a family emergency in the next county. Gathering in Morgan's office, the three discussed the video and what Sasha had found out about Caesar Martinez.

"We need to get this asshole of the streets," Morgan said to start the meeting. "I called judge Harrison and she's going to give us a meeting in her chambers in an hour. She's eager to see what we have on this guy; nobody wants this in our county and to stop that, we have to stop him." 

Morgan turned his attention to Daryl. "What do you know about the three other men in the video?"

"The two who took the packages are Flip and Jason. They're local kids who grew up at the lake. I suspect them of the burglaries too. I haven't met them, but I know a guy who knows them. From what I've seen and heard, they're nothing but trouble. I think we should go after them for the drugs, then add the burglary charges."

"I agree," Sasha offered. "They're shady characters. I've seen them around town and I would suspect them of more than just drugs and burglary, but Daryl's right. The drug charges are more important, anything else can be dealt with later."

"Alright, let's load up. I sent Judge Harrison the video earlier, so hopefully she's had enough time to look at it. Sasha, do you have the research on Martinez?"

"It's in my bag in the trunk of the car. I assume we're taking a squad car to the courthouse?"

"Yep, grab your bag as we leave. There's no telling how long we'll be with the judge; we'll grab something to eat on the way back. Lunch is on me." Morgan said as he grabbed his jacket and badge, and walked out the door with the detectives.

**************************************************************************************************************************************

They only had to wait a couple of minutes to see Judge Harrison. Andrea and Morgan went way back; she had worked in the DA's office for a few years when Chief Jones was still a homicide detective, and they had been quite close at one time.

"It's good to see you Morgan," the judge said as she welcomed him and the two detectives to her chambers. 

"Good to see you too, Andrea." Morgan said as he kissed her cheek. "I'd like to introduce detectives Daryl Dixon and Sasha Williams." Andrea shook their hands and directed them to have a seat in front of her desk. "Have you had a chance to look at the video I sent you?" Morgan asked her.

"Yes, I have. I assume the man in the video is the person you suspect to be the manufacturer and distributer of the drugs?

"Yes, ma'am," Daryl spoke up. "We don't know anything about him except for what Sasha's found out, but I think he's gotta be the one putting the drugs out there. I also suspect those two boys in the video have something to do with the string of burglaries, but I haven't found any evidence of that."

Judge Harrison flipped through the folder that she had taken from Sasha, and quietly read it to herself. She was personal friends with Deanna Monroe, the congress woman whose son had been killed by Martinez, and vowed to herself that if she ever had the opportunity to see him in her courtroom, she would take it.

"I wasn't going to bother reading this file, but I did out of personal curiosity. When Morgan told me you found Mr. Martinez, I signed an arrest warrant immediately. Please get this man; I want to be the one who sends him to Hell."

**************************************************************************************************************************************

There was very little conversation between the detectives and the Chief during lunch. Daryl couldn't stop thinking about Van, and wasn't paying attention to what Sasha and Morgan were saying. 

"Daryl, are you okay?" Morgan asked.

"Yeah, I just have a lot on my mind." He answered, stuffing almost an entire spring roll into his mouth.

"Does this have anything to do with your new friend?" Sasha asked him.

"Mmmmm, I guess it does," Daryl replied.

"Have you talked to him about how you feel?" Sasha asked.

"He knows that I care about him. He knows that he's important to me. I just can't stop thinking about him." Daryl confessed.

"I can't tell you what to do, Daryl," Morgan said, "but I trust you to make the right decision. I know you won't let this interfere with the investigation, and if you're one hundred percent sure that this friend of yours isn't involved in the burglaries or drugs, if the two of you care about each other, it will work out if it's supposed to."

Daryl shook his head. "I understand what y'all are saying, but when he finds out that his friends are most likely going to prison and I helped put them there, he's gonna think I used him, and he's gonna hate me. He doesn't need another person to leave him; he's had enough of that."

Sasha put her arm around him. "Daryl, you got to believe that if you love each other, it will work out. He'll be pissed, I'm sure, but you have to convince him that you love him. If he trusts you, he'll realize you never meant to hurt him, you just have to make him believe."

"That's all I've been trying to do, Sash. He's been hurt by just about everyone, and I don't want him to think I'd do that to him. I don't want him to think that this is all a lie, because it's not."

"And he'll see that," Morgan added. "You don't lie, Daryl; you don't bullshit, and you need to make sure that he knows that about you. I say we've got a few days before Martinez is spotted again. Take that time and spend it with him; show him that you're truthful and sincere, and tell him you want to have a relationship with him. I've never seen or had a relationship where no one ever gets hurt, but you and he have to have a foundation that will help you forgive each other when it happens."

"Y'all are right. I just gotta stop thinking that everything is gonna go to shit. I've never felt like this before; not even for Rick, and I'm scared." He paused for a moment and took one last bite of his food. "I guess we better get back. I don't want to waste any more time without him, whatever time I got left."

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Van's father started yelling at him the moment he walked into the house. "Where the hell have you been, you little shit? You were needed here last night!"

"I was at the lake." Van didn't want to argue with him; he was still feeling the high from being with Daryl. Van could still feel the man's lips and hands on his body.

"I hope it was worth it," the older man continued to yell. "I couldn't get the fuck outta bed and I pissed all over myself and the wheelchair."

Van sighed deeply. "I'm sorry. Just let me shower and change clothes. I'll put the sheets in the washer and fix your breakfast. I'll only be a few minutes."

"You’re an ungrateful piece of shit, you know that, Van? I raised you, fed you, clothed you, and made sure you had a roof over your head. I've done all that for you, and you can't take care of me when I need you? You don't do anything for me."

Van's blood began to boil. He turned around, walked right up to his father's wheelchair, got in his face, and growled. "I do everything for you, old man. I cook your meals, I dress you, I clean you, I wash your goddamn laundry, keep your house clean, and chauffeur you around town. I do everything for you except hold your dick when you piss, and have more than paid you back for anything you ever did for me. I took one night for myself because I needed to, and you know what? I think I might be doing more of that in the future. Now sit here and wait for me to come back."

Van went into his father's room and ripped the sheets off the bed. The high he had felt when he walked into the house was gone, and he felt the oppression of his situation coming back. His eyes were stinging with unshed tears that he refused to let go of; he tried to keep Daryl in his mind, but his anger was fighting the happy memories from earlier that morning. 

Throwing the sheets into the laundry room, he went to the bathroom and jumped in the shower. He regretted having to wash the smell of the man he now was sure he was in love with off him, but hoped that he would be surrounded by that scent again, and smiled thinking about what would come next for them. 

Once clean and dressed, he threw the sheets in the washer and went to the kitchen to start breakfast for his father. He wasn't going to do anything elaborate, like he was known to do. Especially anything as special as what Daryl had made for him that morning, and put as little effort into the chore as possible. 

Neither of them spoke as Van wheeled his father to the table and sat a plate of eggs, bacon, and toast in front of him, then sat down. "You’re not going to eat?" The man asked his son.

"Not hungry," Van replied. He tried to bring his happy memories to the front of his mind again to escape the moment, and smiled to himself unconsciously. 

"What the fuck do you have to smile about" Richard asked grumpily.

Van chuckled and looked his father in the eye. "I'm not telling you, old man. You don't care, and wouldn't understand anyway. Just finish your food and I'll get you cleaned up and dressed. Make a list of what you need to do today; I'm going outside for a smoke."

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Van absolutely hated giving his dad a sponge bath. If he was a nurse, and had to do it as a part of his job, he would have preferred bathing a wrinkly, ninety-year-old woman rather than his father. The older man usually spent his time complaining to Van about everything under the sun. The medical bills, his medications and doctors, and of course, all the things Van did wrong.

This morning, Richard wasn't saying much. He had been thinking about Van's outburst from this morning, and knew something had happened with his son. Whatever it was, it had changed him in a slight way. If Van had found someone new to spend his time with, Richard would lose him; he would be abandoned to a rehabilitation hospital and lose the only family he had left. He needed to find out who she was and how to get rid of her.

Van got his father cleaned, dressed and into the car within the hour. The list of chores and errands his father had made listed the grocery store, hobby shop, and drug store as priorities. Van drove them to the hobby shop first; his father needed new brushes and bottles of paint for his Army men and Van helped him pick out the colors he needed.

The drug store had his father's pain medication ready and waiting for him when they arrived, and the pharmacist tried to be friendly and start a conversation with Richard, but the man was cold and rude, as usual, and made Van get him out of the store immediately. The grocery store was the last stop, and for Van, the easiest and least stressful of the day. All that was required of him was to push his father around, and stop when he was told to.

Van walked dreamily up and down the grocery aisles putting things in the small basket as he was told. He was thinking about Daryl again. He couldn't get that man out of his head and never wanted to. He could look into those blue eyes for the rest of his life and never become bored; he hoped that Daryl felt the same about him.

Hoping was something that Van had stopped doing after his mother left, and he never imagined that he would ever hope for anything again, but Daryl could pull that long, lost feeling out of him. There were things he wanted to experience with Daryl and wanted Daryl to teach him about. Van wanted to make Daryl happy and learn how to please him. He knew Daryl had more experience than him, but also knew that his own inexperience wouldn't push Daryl away. He was eager to touch the man and show him how much he loved him.

When they arrived back at the house, Van helped his father inside, then brought in all their purchases and put them away. He was itching to see Daryl and had become hyper sensitive to everything around him. When he heard the television come on in the other room, he jumped in surprise from the sudden noise. He growled to himself and when he was finished putting the groceries away, he quickly made his father a sandwich and sat it on the coffee table in front of him.

"Do you need anything right now?" He asked, curtly.

"No, I'm good for now; you leaving again?"

"I'm going to the lake for a swim. Won't be long, maybe an hour or two. I'll be back in time to fix dinner." Van said, and grabbed the keys to his bike. He wasn't going to give his father a chance to respond and hurried out the door. As the door swung shut, he heard his father get in the last word.

"Well, be careful and don't drown."


	12. An Egyptian River

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just Van and Daryl, and smut.

Chapter Twelve- An Egyptian River

 

The next morning, Daryl was up early. He hadn't seen Van at the lake when he returned home, and stayed up late hoping to see him, but he never showed. Daryl didn't want to jump to conclusions, so he convinced himself that Van was either at home with his dad, or somewhere with Flip and Jason. He didn't like the idea of Van being at home with his emotionally abusive father, but he would rather him be there than out with his two suspects.

Pouring two cups of coffee, and putting his notebook under his arm, he went outside and waited patiently on the porch. He hadn't started writing the story of this case yet, and wondered if he should make it a love story instead.

He had written three pages and finished his coffee when he heard someone whistling at him. He looked up from his notebook and saw Van standing on the dock in nothing but a pair of board shorts.

"Why don't you come down and race me?" He yelled from a distance.

Daryl left his notebook, and the remaining cup of now cold coffee, on the porch and ran down to meet the beautiful, young man he had fallen in love with. He wrapped his arms around Van the moment he was close enough to do so. Daryl held him tightly and nuzzled his face in the other man's neck, breathing him in and relishing the feeling of Van in his arms.

"I missed you so much," Daryl whispered into Van's skin. "I thought about you all day yesterday, and all last night."

"I missed you too," Van replied, as he pulled back and laid a gentle kiss on Daryl's lips. "I couldn't stop thinking about you either. Yesterday sucked."

Daryl grinned and laid a sweet kiss on Van's lips. "Yeah, it did." 

They stood with their arms around each other for a while, until the bright sun, shining down on them, became too hot. "I came down here for a race, and I'm ready to beat your ass again," Daryl said, and smiled brightly.

"Are you sure that's the only thing you want to do to my ass?" Van asked as he pushed himself out of Daryl's arms and dove into the lake.

Daryl was stunned by Van's reply, but followed him into the water without a word. Daryl grabbed him by the waist as they broke through the surface of the lake. Looking into the other man's eyes, Daryl saw mischief and excitement, and wanted to know what was going through Van's mind.

"You know I won't do anything you don't want me to," Daryl said. "You can trust me. I don't ever want to hurt you." Daryl stroked Van's cheek with dripping fingers; Van closed his eyes and relaxed at the touch.

"I know; I trust you." He replied. "Now, let's work up an appetite so I can fix us breakfast."

**************************************************************************************************************************************

An hour later, Van and Daryl were tired and their skin pruned. They helped each other onto the dock and walked back to the house, hand in hand. Daryl had forgotten about the coffee and his notebook; he handed the cup to Van and tucked the notebook under his arm.

As they entered the house, Daryl sat his notebook on the kitchen table and went to the bathroom to get towels for them both, and clothes for each of them. When he returned, Van was sitting at the table with the now hot cup of coffee in his hand and looking at Daryl's notebook.

"Wow," he exclaimed as Daryl handed him a towel and the same clothes he had worn yesterday. "This is good." Van held up the notebook and waved it around.

"Oh shit. You read that? I didn't mean to leave that laying out." Daryl said and blushed a very pretty shade of pink.

"I didn't read all of it, just a few lines, but its sounds good. You've got a way with words." Van said as he took the towel and clothes from Daryl. "You should try to get something published."

Daryl laughed. "I'm not that good," he replied. "It takes a lot to find someone who believes in your talent enough to invest in it."

Van puts his arms around Daryl's neck and kisses the side of his mouth. "I believe in you, and your talent." He ran his fingers through Daryl's wet hair as he stepped back. "I'll go dry off and get dressed; be back in a minute."

Daryl turned to watch Van go into the bathroom. He sighed and shook his head. For as much as Daryl worried about hurting the other man, he hadn't once considered the fact that he was going to be breaking his own heart as well, until now.

When the truth came out, Daryl would hate himself as much as Van surely would; his hurt would be just as deep and scarring, but not being able to see the other man, touch him, or hear his voice again would torture Daryl for the rest of his life.

Daryl stripped out of his shorts right there in the kitchen, and wrapped his towel around his waist. He didn't hear Van returning and turned around to see him leaning against the door frame.

"Dammit!" Van exclaimed as he pushed off and sauntered over to where Daryl was standing by the refrigerator. "You stripped and I missed it."

Daryl pulled Van into his chest. "Don't worry. I don't have any plans for today; we can do whatever we want. If you want a show, I'll give you a show. I'll give you anything you want."

He kissed Van tenderly, and held him close, trying to convey the things he couldn't say yet. "Tell me what you want."

"I want to spend the day with you. I want to touch you and feel you. I just want to be with you."

"I want that too," Daryl replied. "I want to spend all my days with you." He put his hands on Van's face and took his lips again. Van moved his arms around Daryl's neck and pushed himself closer and tighter into his body.

"Do you want breakfast, or would you rather get our day started?" Daryl asked after he broke the kiss. 

"Let's work up an appetite, then I'll make us a big lunch," Van said, smiling and blushing.

"I like that idea," Daryl said and took Van's hand in his, leading toward the bedroom.

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Daryl pushed Van against the door once it was closed behind them. His mouth went to the other man's neck and he grabbed his hips. Van moaned and moved his hips against Daryl's; his mind went blank like it did the last time Daryl had touched him. 

Daryl took Van's hands and put them on his waist where the towel was tied. "Need you to touch me," he whined.

Van had never touched another man; he hadn't really even seen a dick before, other than his own. He didn't count all the times he had taken communal showers after gym class or swimming practice; he was fucking Julie then, and dicks didn't interest him.

Van hesitated for a moment before releasing the knot on Daryl's towel and letting it fall to the floor. Looking down cautiously, he saw Daryl's cock, hard and at full mast. It wasn't much longer than his own, but it was thicker, and he gasped at the thought of having it inside him.

"Don't be afraid," Daryl said softly. "You don't have to if you don't want to. I can take care of you, if you'd rather."

"No," he replied, not wanting the anxiety to rule the moment. "I want to; just don't know what to do."

Daryl ran his fingers through Van's still damp hair. "Just do what feels right; touch me the way you touch yourself. I want you to feel right about what you do; don't want you to worry if you’re doing it right. Just show me how you feel."

Van smiled at him and nodded his head, then wrapped his hand around the base of Daryl's throbbing cock. When he squeezed lightly, Daryl moaned and rested his forehead against Van's shoulder. Daryl never thought he would feel the touch of another man again, at least one that he loved, and loved him back; neither of them had said those words yet, but Daryl could feel it in his heart. He could see it in the way Van looked at him, and felt it in his touch.

Van moved his hand upward and twisted it slightly around the tip, the precum dripping through his fingers as he slowly moved his hand up and down Daryl's thick shaft. Daryl's legs became weak and he held onto Van, moaning and gasping with every movement of Van's hand. 

"You are absolutely amazing, Van." Daryl said in a stuttering voice. "It feels so fucking good; don't stop."

With his free hand, Van carded his fingers through Daryl's hair. "I won't stop, Daryl. I want to make you feel good." 

It wasn't long before Daryl felt himself at the edge of the cliff. His hold on Van tightened as he spilled over onto the other man's hand; as he released himself, he felt Van's hand rubbing his back and his voice in his ear.

"Are you okay? Was it good?" Van asked, his heart in his throat waiting for Daryl's response. 

Daryl lifted his head and stared at Van with hazy eyes. "I'm perfect; you're perfect." Daryl took Van's lips, pushing him further into the door with the force of it. Van gasped, startled by Daryl's sudden advance, but wrapped his arms around the other man's neck kissing him back with fervor.

When they broke the kiss, both men were breathing heavily. Daryl cupped Van's face in his hands and stroked his cheeks softly. "I love you more than I have ever loved another human being. I will always love you; promise me that you will never forget that."

Van almost cried when he heard Daryl profess his love. "I won't; I promise. I . . . I . . . I love you too, Daryl. More than anything in the world."

Daryl kissed him again and slid his hands under Van's shirt, lifting it up and over his head. His mouth moved to his neck and shoulders, then his chest. He took Van by the waistband of his sweats and pulled him away from the door and toward the bed.

Daryl hooked his thumbs inside the sweats and pushed them down, letting them pool around Van's ankles. "I want to taste you," he said as his tongue darted out to lick Van's nipple. "I want to feel you in my mouth and make you cum."

Van's knees buckled, and he fell back onto the bed. Daryl wasted no time crawling over him slowly, like a predator, and taking his lips again. Van wrapped his arms around Daryl, stroking his back as their kiss grew more passionate. Daryl moved down Van's body, kissing and licking his way down to his hip bones, where he left faint bruises that would show they belong to each other.

Van's heart was beating out of his chest, and he was breathing heavily in anticipation of feeling Daryl's mouth around him. "Please, Daryl. Stop teasing me."

Daryl looked up at him and smiled. "I just want you to know how good it can be getting there. The anticipation can be just as good as the outcome. Foreplay ain't nothing to mess around with."

Van groaned and let his head fall back onto the mattress. "Fuck, I think I'm gonna cum before I even feel you."

Daryl snickered. "Alright then; just relax and enjoy." He gave Van a couple of quick strokes before leaning down to lick a drop of precum from his slit. Van grasped the sheets beneath him and instinctively moved his hips up trying to get his dick into Daryl's mouth. 

Daryl laid a hand on Van's stomach to keep him still and swirled his tongue around the head. Sealing his lips around it, he sucked gently while running his tongue across his slit. Van prayed that he would be able to last, but was already feeling the build up to his orgasm.

"Oh God, Daryl!" He cried. "Don't stop, please!"

Daryl popped off and looked up at Van. The look on his face made Daryl's dick stir. "I told you, I ain't gonna stop until I feel you cum down my throat."

Daryl then returned to what he was doing, but this time, he took Van fully down his throat. He began a steady up and down rhythm, keeping his eyes on the other man the whole time. Daryl watched as Van's face contorted in pleasure, and decided right then and there that he would do anything to see that for the rest of his days.

Van was moaning and writhing on the bed, and Daryl was mesmerized. He had never had a man react this enthusiastically to his touch, and it gave him an insatiable desire to see Van wrecked and spent underneath him.

He hummed around Van's cock and massaged his balls, and soon he felt Van's hand on the back of his head, holding him in place.

"Oh God! I'm gonna cum!" Van screamed and sat up, still holding Daryl's head. He moved his hips furiously as he spilled into Daryl's warm mouth, then collapsed back onto the bed once he was empty.

Daryl sat up and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. Van looked wrecked and spent, just as Daryl had imagined. His eyes were closed, and he had a drunken smile across his face. Daryl leaned over him, supporting himself on his hands, and kissed Van slowly.

"How do you feel?" He asked, sitting up and running his hands down Van's chest.

"I've never felt anything like that; never had anybody suck my dick before," Van replied breathlessly.

Daryl's eyes grew wide. "You're kidding. Julie never did that for you?"

"No, she said that only whores suck dick. She was too prim and proper to get on her knees."

Daryl moved to lay next to Van and wrapped him up in his arms. "She has no idea what she was missing. I'm gonna make sure that you get everything you want and need. I want to show you how good it can be."

They kissed each other languidly, wrapped tightly around each other, but Van wanted more. "Fuck me, Daryl. I want you to fuck me."

Daryl pulled away; stoking Van's face with his thumb, he smiled. "Are you sure? We don't have to do that right now. Maybe you should rest, take a nap, or I could get us something to eat. You need to keep up your strength if we're gonna be together all day."

Van vehemently shook his head. "No, I want this, and I don't want to waste any of our time together. I never got to have this with Doug because I was confused and didn't know what I was feeling. I'm not confused anymore, I know what I want, and I want you to fuck me."

"I can't say no to you, but I want to do this my way. Let me take you the way I want you."

"I trust you, and I want this with you. I know your gonna be leaving at some point. You've got a job and a house; responsibilities you got to get back to. I don't know if I'll see you again after your gone, and I want to give myself to you."

A twinge of guilt ran through Daryl, but things were too good right now, and he wasn’t going to spoil this day. He got out of bed and went to the dresser, where he took out a box of condoms and a bottle of lube. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he sat them down, and took a foil packet out of the box.

"How long has it been since you were with someone?" Van asked.

"About a year and a half. It didn't end up being anything. Why?"

"I just thought, maybe we wouldn't have to use a condom. It’s my first time, and it’s been a while for you. I'd like to know what it feels like without it. Is that okay?"

"Yeah, baby. That's perfectly alright with me. I'm gonna take my time getting you ready though; I don't want to hurt you more than necessary. It is gonna hurt, but you gotta tell me if it's too much. I'll pull out if you need me to. You gotta promise me you'll tell me to stop, Van; I will. I won't hesitate."

Van sat up and moved behind Daryl; wrapping his arms around the man's neck. "I know you won't hurt me" he said into Daryl's ear. "I know it'll hurt a little, but the lube will help, so I'm not worried. I just want to feel as much of you as I can."

Daryl turned around and Van scooted back on the bed. "I want you more than anything; more than I've wanted anyone in a long time. I want to do this right; make it the best time of your life."

"It will be, I know it. Now, stop talking and take me." Van let Daryl arrange him the way he wanted; hands and knees on the bed, with his head on the mattress. 

Daryl squeezed a large amount of lube on his fingers and Van's beautifully puckered hole. As soon as Daryl's finger touched him, Van released a deep, longing moan. 

"Just relax," Daryl said. "I'm going slip a finger in. Just keep breathing."

Van tried to steady his breath, but when Daryl's finger breeched him, he stopped breathing all together. Daryl rubbed his back as he continued to work his digit further inside him, and could feel Van relax and loosen up.

Daryl's pace was steady, and when he felt it was time, added another finger. Van was pushing back onto Daryl as he stretched him out. As amazing as Daryl had already made him feel, he believed that this was, and would be, the one thing he would dream about most. 

Van was hard again in no time, and he alternated between moving back onto Daryl's fingers and seeking the friction of moving his cock against the sheets. 

Daryl inserted a third finger, and Van began to squirm. The fullness and the stretching was almost unbearable, and he desperately needed Daryl's cock to drive him through the bed.

Before he could start begging Daryl to fuck him, he felt the man's fingers slowly exit him. He cried out in protest, but soon felt Daryl's lips on his back.

"Are you alright? Did that feel good?" Daryl asked him as he trailed wet, open mouthed kisses across his skin.

"God, yes." Van's voice was shaky, and he buried his face in the sheets as he spoke.

"I think you're ready for me. Remember what I told you?"

Van could barely remember his own name, but was able to tell Daryl that he would tell him to stop if he needed him to. He also added that he could never imagine ever wanted him stop.

Daryl sat back on his knees and poured a more than generous amount of lube on his dick, then hoisted Van up by the hips and lined himself up. He entered Van slowly; pushing himself past the tight ring of muscle until he was balls deep inside him.

Van had tensed up quite a bit during the journey, but never once asked him to stop or pull out. When he was completely ensconced, Daryl remained still.

"Are you okay? Do you want me to keep going?"

"Just give me a minute, then I want you to fuck me through this bed." 

Van's words made Daryl growl low in his chest. "You say when, and I will do exactly that, baby."

Daryl ran his hands down Van's back and took him by the hips; soon Van gave the word, and Daryl pulled out slightly. His pace was slow to start with; he wanted to make sure that Van would be ready for the onslaught he had begged for. 

Van was breathing heavily, and his eyes were clenched shut. He appreciated the fact that Daryl didn't want to hurt him, but the man's pace was torturous. As good as it felt, he needed more. "Daryl, please. I need you faster, harder."

Daryl snapped his hips, and moved faster; pounding Van's ass and hitting his prostate with every thrust. Van felt like he was losing his mind; his body couldn't keep up with the blinding pace Daryl had set, and he relinquished his attempts.

Suddenly, Daryl pulled him up and into his arms. Van's head rolled back onto Daryl's shoulder and he felt a strong hand pumping his cock. "I'm close, baby. Can you cum again?" Daryl said in a strained voice.

"Yes, please, yes!" He cried out in response, and a few strokes later, was spilling all over Daryl's hand and the sheets beneath him. 

Daryl looked down and watched Van cum; it tipped him over the edge and he released inside him, hard. The force of it nearly pushing them forward and onto the bed. Daryl held him close, his grip tightening around Van's hips, and they rode their orgasms out together.

Daryl finally released Van and the younger man fell onto the bed, bouncing slightly as he did. Daryl flopped down beside him and laid his arm around Van's back. He brushed the hair from Van's neck and softly kissed him.

"How do you feel, baby?" He asked.

"Boneless," Van answered as he turned over onto his back. "Fuck me, Daryl. I think I could sleep for a week."

Daryl laughed out loud. "I did fuck you sweetheart. Couldn't you tell?"

"Hell, that's the only truth I know right now. It was the most amazing experience I've ever had. Thank you."

"You don't have to thank me, baby. I think you're amazing, and beautiful, and I don't see how I can ever live without you."

Van smiled at him sleepily. "I like that."

"You like everything, or something in particular?"

"I loved everything, but I especially liked hearing you call me baby."

"I'll call you whatever you want. You mean so much to me, Van. I don't ever want to lose you."

"You won't, I promise." Van buried his face in Daryl's neck and laid his hand over his heart. "I can't imagine anything that would take me away from you; I won't let it."

A thought crept into Daryl's mind, but he quickly dismissed it. He was not going to let anything ruin this beautiful moment, or his future with the man he loves.


	13. Busted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everybody gets busted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only two chapters left in this one.

Chapter Thirteen- Busted

 

Van stayed with Daryl until the sun began to set. They laid together, and slept for a while, then Van made lunch; after, they watched a movie, and made love again. When it was time for him to go back home, Van took his time getting dressed. This had been the most wonderful day of his life; he felt like a completely different person. Daryl had absolutely changed his life, and not even going home to his shitty house and asshole dad could dampen his joy.

"I'll see you tomorrow, right?" Daryl asked as he walked with Van to the door.

"Of course, every day until you get tired of me," Van replied, looking away from Daryl's eyes.

Daryl turned Van's head to look at him. "I will never, ever, ever, ever get tired of being with you. I can't imagine not wanting to see your face, or touch your body; losing you would break me." 

"Me too," Van replied. They kissed each other sweetly, and held each other one last time. "I love you, Daryl. I don't think I'll be able to sleep tonight without you."

Daryl smiled. "I'm sure I won't be sleeping either, baby. I'll be thinking about you though, wishing I was with you."

Van smiled back at him. "You can tell me all about tomorrow." Van kissed him again, then stepped outside the door and walked down the path to the dock, and into the woods.

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Daryl sat in his chair on the porch, trying to recount his day with Van in story form. It was more difficult to do than he thought it would be. It's hard to write a sex scene without it sounding like a bad Harlequin novel. Maybe he'd just draw pictures.

Looking out onto the lake, Daryl pictured it in his head. He had an image of the two of them entangled with each other, him moving in and out of Van; it was better than anything he had ever experienced before. Even Rick had never given him the high that Van did.

Daryl lost track of time, and had no idea how long he had been sitting there until he felt his phone vibrate on his hip. It was Sasha; he wouldn't have answered it, but at this time of night, it had to be important.

"What's going on, Sash?"

"I know it's late, but I've been following Flip and Jason around town for the last two hours. They made a couple deals, and now they're hanging out under the street lamp where you took the video. I think they might be waiting on Martinez."

"You better be careful they don't see you," Daryl warned her.

"I've been doing this longer than you, Dixon. I know how to keep myself from being seen. Besides, they're not paying a damn bit of attention to anything. Jason stepped off the curb and almost got hit by a car. They don't have a clue."

"Alright, stay put and keep your eyes on 'em; I'm on my way. Call the locals and tell them what's happening; if Martinez shows I want to take him. We'll need backup for that."

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Daryl parked his car in the grocery store lot and walked the back alleys to the antique store, where he found Sasha's car. He checked his pocket for his badge and his holster for his gun, again. His nerves were fried, and he wasn't sure if he wanted to take down Martinez tonight, or not. He wasn't ready for the consequences of those actions.

Quietly knocking on the passenger's window, Daryl opened the door and climbed in as fast as he could. "What have I missed?"

"Nothing yet. They're just sitting there, smoking, and acting like ten-year-old's. I think I heard one of them make a fart joke."

"That sounds about right. I really don't see how a man like Martinez would pick idiots like that to do a job like this. How could he possibly trust them?"

"I'm sure he doesn't. I'm sure he keeps an eye on them; they're expendable. If things get tight, they can go to jail and he skips town."

"Or they can sleep with the fishes. He's not opposed to murder, ya know." Daryl said and focused on the scene in front of him. "Did you call the station?"

"Yeah, they're sending backup, but I told them to hold off until we got Martinez in sight. I tuned into the frequency they use and I'll let them know the minute we see him."

"We can hold them until they get here, if we have to. I'd rather not have to, though." Daryl was fidgeting in the close quarters of the small vehicle. He hoped that Martinez wouldn't show; he wasn't ready for this to be over yet.

"I put in a call to Morgan too." Sasha added. "He said to be careful and not do anything stupid or dangerous. I told him I'd already called you, so it was too late to worry about that."

"Smartass," Daryl replied. "Just keep your eyes open. I don't want to waste any time if that fucker shows."

They didn't have to wait much longer; the mysterious Civic pulled up to the corner thirty minutes later. Sasha held the walkie in her hand, ready to call for backup, and Daryl took out his phone and started recording.

They watched as Martinez got out of the car and walked over to the boys. "Best go ahead and call for backup. They can be here in two minutes. We might need them before then."

Sasha called it in, and within the next two minutes, squad cars could be seen on the surrounding side streets. Martinez, Flip, and Jason continued to talk as they held themselves up against the car. Sasha made sure everyone was on standby and told them to wait for the signal.

When Martinez opened the trunk, Sasha yelled, "Go!" into the walkie and six uniformed police officers descended onto the scene. Sasha and Daryl exited the car quickly, their weapons raised, and ran across the street.

Before they got to the other side, Martinez made a run for it, pulling a gun from the back of his pants. Daryl took off after him, fired one shot and missed. He followed the escaping fugitive down an alley way to the parallel street. Martinez took a shot at him as he rounded the corner, but missed. 

Daryl tried to run him into a corner, but Martinez knew this place better than he did, and it felt like the man was leading him somewhere. He took another shot at him and saw him stumble, but he kept running. As he turned another corner, Martinez turned and shot again, this time, hitting Daryl in the shoulder.

Daryl didn't falter in his steps, but continued to chase the fugitive in through the streets. Suddenly the flashing lights of a squad car appeared in front of them and screeched to a halt. Martinez attempted to run around the vehicle, but was stopped short when he was tackled from behind by Daryl.

It took two officers to wrangle cuffs on Martinez before they were finally able to get him into the backseat of the cruiser. One officer sat in the back with him, while the other drove; Daryl sat, bleeding in the passenger's seat.

When they returned to the scene, Flip and Jason were already cuffed and in the back of another cruiser. Sasha and the other officers were inspecting the Civic and hauling off bags of drugs, money, and guns. "Oh my God! Dixon!" Sasha yelled when Daryl got out of the vehicle.

"I'm alright, Sash. Just a flesh wound." Daryl grimaced. 

"I'll get one of the officers to drive you to the hospital, and don't give me shit about it. Let them take the bullet out, if it's still in there, and bandage you up. Then you can come to the station and help me with the paperwork."

Daryl sighed. "I ain't gonna argue with you." He turned to the officer who had driven them back. "Let's go, so I can get back and get this taken care of."

As they drove to the hospital, Daryl thought of Van for the first time since he had gotten out of Sasha's car. He was even more grateful for the day they had, since he knew it was the first and only time they would be together.

**************************************************************************************************************************************

While Daryl was getting patched up in the emergency room, Flip and Jason were being booked at the station. When it came time to make their one phone call, they figured there was only one person who they could call to bail them out.

"What. The. Fuck. Do. You. Want?" Van said sleepily when he answered the phone.

"Hey man," Jason said. "Sorry to wake you up, but Flip and I need to you come down and bail us out."

"You're in jail? What the fuck am I saying? Of course, your dumbasses are in jail. What did you do?"

"Drug bust, man."

"Just you and Flip, or did they get that Mexican motherfucker too?" Van asked as he pulled his jeans up on his hips.

"Yeah, got him too. An undercover officer chased his ass down; Martinez shot him in the shoulder." Jason said, and laughed.

"Good; I told you idiots to stay away from that asshole. How much for bail?" 

"Two grand each. They said that Martinez was the one they were after; we were just a means to get to him. They’re gonna rape us on burglary charges though."

Shit, Van thought. Those two assholes would probably tell the cops that he was with them on one of the break-ins. "Okay, give me time to get the money, then I'll be there." He left a note for his dad, grabbed his keys and headed out on his motorcycle.

**************************************************************************************************************************************

An hour and a half after leaving the scene, Daryl walked into the police station, his arm bandaged and in a sling. After finding Sasha in one of the offices, he asked for an update.

"The delinquents have been booked and bail set. There just chilling in a cell until their sprung. The judge decided that he'd rather get them on the burglary charges, so he set bail pretty low. Martinez was denied bail; they have to decide who gets to try him first. I’m thinking DC gets him before anyone else. He's cooling his heels in a cell on the other side of the building."

"Alright, what do you need me to do?" Daryl asked, the painkillers they had given him at the hospital were fading and his entire arm was throbbing.

"Unless you've learned to write with your left hand your useless for paperwork tonight. Grab a recorder and tape your statement. I can type it up for you when you're done. Oh, and get me a cup of coffee, and one for yourself. You've earned it." She said and gave him a smile.

"Smartass," he replied and got up to fetch coffee and a recorder. 

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Van came through the front door as Daryl was pouring coffee. They didn't see each other at first, but Daryl recognized his voice when he heard Van at the reception desk.

He didn't want to turn around. He didn't want to be seen here, knowing that the minute he caught Van's eyes he would be found out. The officer at the desk took care of taking the bail payments and told Van that it would be about thirty minutes before his friends would be ready to go home.

Daryl was frozen; he was afraid that if he remained standing there, Van would see him. He was afraid that if he moved, he may never have the chance to see Van again. Before he could complete his thought, he heard his name being called from across the room. 

"Daryl? Is that you?" He heard Van's footsteps coming closer, and took a deep breath before turning around. "What are you doing here? Jason called me and said that they'd been arrested in a drug bust. Why are you….?" He stopped talking when he noticed that Daryl's arm was in a sling.

"You were shot, weren't you?" Van took a step back when he realized that Daryl's arm was in a sling, and he remembered what Jason had told him.

"Yes," Daryl answered, and hung his head. "I think we need to talk. Can we go outside? I need a smoke."

Tears glistened in Van's eyes as he turned and followed Daryl out the front door. He didn't know what Daryl was going to tell him, but he had a strong feeling that he had been used and betrayed in the name of justice. 

Once the station was behind them, Van took the lit cigarette Daryl offered him and took a long drag while Daryl struggled to speak. 

"Do you remember everything I said to you yesterday?" 

"Yes," Van replied. "What do you need to tell me?"

"I'm an undercover detective and my assignment was to break up the drug and burglary ring. Sasha, the woman from the antique store, is my partner. We got 'em tonight; arrested your friends, Flip and Jason, and we arrested the ringleader, Martinez."

Van threw his cigarette in the parking lot and faced Daryl. "Let me guess, you chased him through town and he shot you in the shoulder?"

"Yeah, how did…?"

"Jason told me when he called me to come bail out him and Flip. He thought it was fucking hilarious." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a joint, and lit it with a pack of matches he had in his pocket. 

"So, what you want to tell me is that you fucked me, told me you loved me, and listened to me tell you about every shitty thing that's happened to me just to make an arrest?"

"Van, I do love you; more than I've ever loved anyone. I meant every word I said to you. I know you love me too, and I didn't use you. I didn't even know Flip and Jason existed until after I met you."

"Didn't stop you from playing me once you knew they were involved. Were you trying to get information out of me; think I'd tell you shit about them? Sorry I burdened you with my problems instead of giving up my friends to the fucking cops."

Van paused for a few minutes before continuing; he paced back and forth in front of Daryl while the man lit another cigarette. "I told you about my family, my father. I told you about Julie; I told you about Doug. I told you how confused I was. You helped me find out who I am. For the first time in my life, I was happy. No one ever touched me like that; no one ever made me good about who I am. I won't ever forget the things you said to me. I'll play them over in my head for the rest of my life, and try to convince myself that they were true."

He didn't give Daryl a chance to speak before he got on his bike and sped off back to his shitty house and his asshole dad.


	14. You Are a Part of Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reconcilliation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last official chapter. Next one is he Epilogue/HEA. Hope you enjoy.

Chapter Fourteen- You Are a Part of Me

 

It took Daryl two hours to record his statement; every now and then he would have to stop the recorder and refocus. He had finally stopped crying, but the tears threatened to fall again every time he took a breath. He screamed Van's name as the man tore off on his motorcycle, but it hadn't caught his attention, or maybe it had. It didn't matter either way.

Daryl stood outside the police station for God knows how long, wiping tears from his face and taking steps toward the tracks left by the bike. He knew he would never catch up to Van, and even if he could, Van would keep riding until he was left behind again.

He kept his head down once he finally went back into the station. Forgetting about the coffee, he went to the supply closet and took a recorder and two cassettes and went back to the office where Sasha was still working. She could tell something was wrong as soon as he walked into the room. "Daryl, are you okay?"

"No Sash, I'm not." He sat across from her on the opposite side of the desk. His eyes were red and swollen from crying, he steeled himself to keep from doing it again. "He was posting bail for them. He hates me Sash; he's not gonna forgive me for this."

Sasha stood from her chair and got on her knees in front of him. Hugging Daryl tightly, she offered a few of her own tears, and as much comfort as she thought he would accept.

"Tell me what happened, Daryl. Tell me exactly what he said."

"He said that I only wanted to be with him to get information on Flip and Jason. He poured out his heart to me, and regrets it. I told him I love him; he let me touch him, he touched me, and now he believes I used and betrayed him. I'm not going to be able to fix this."

"Yes, you will. Give him some time; let him think things through, and he'll realize that you never did anything to hurt him. He's in shock, Daryl; this came out of left field and he's hurt. I'm almost finished with my paperwork; I'll call Morgan and give him a report. You work at your own pace and I'll drive you back to your car when you're done, okay?"

"Thanks. It might take me a while to get this done though. I can't focus right now." 

"That's fine. I'll let them know and see if someone can drive you when you're finished."

"Call me tomorrow and let me know what Morgan says. I don't feel like talking to anyone; could you tell him I'll check in when I'm feeling better."

"I will. You let me know if you need anything, or just want to talk."

"Will do. I'm gonna try to get this done and go home. I really just want to sleep for a few days."

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Van let the door slam behind him as he walked inside his house. He had broken several traffic laws on his way home, but was fresh out of fucks to give. There was so much anger and hurt inside him, he wanted to burn the house down; he wanted to burn Daryl's house down, but that would have caused more trouble than it was worth.

He sat on the back porch for hours, smoking and seething. He had cried the whole way home, and was out of tears now. He relived everything Daryl said to him; every touch, every kiss, and his tears came back. Even his mother's desertion hadn't affected him this much. 

Van tried to be reasonable and rational, but all he kept thinking was that Daryl didn't trust him enough to be honest with him. He would have told Daryl anything he wanted to know. Van didn't even like those fucktards. The only reason he hung with those douche bags was because they were the only ones who would hang with him. He didn't need them if he had Daryl in his life.

But, he didn't have Daryl in his life anymore. So what the fuck did it even matter.

He was right back where he had started. Alone and trapped with his dipshit father. All the encouragement and good words Daryl had given him, had been lies. He was glad, now, that he and Doug hadn't gone any farther than they did. He couldn't handle this happening to him twice.

Van sat on the porch until daybreak, when he heard his father yelling for him. He crushed his cigarette under his shoe, then went inside to start his shitty day.

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Daryl finally got home around three thirty in the morning. He was exhausted, but couldn't sleep. He considered doing some writing or sketching, but neither of those things would erase Van from his thoughts.

He needed a shower, so he stripped on his way to the bathroom. When the steaming, hot water hit his skin, he winced. He let the water burn him, in a passive aggressive attempt to punish himself for hurting Van.

Daryl didn't know what hurt worse, the knowledge of what he had done, or the pain in his own heart. Not only would he have to live knowing Van hated him, but also with the fact that he would never be able to see or touch him ever again.

Once Daryl was in his pajama pants, he grabbed his smokes and went out to the porch. Looking across at the moonlit covered lake, he thought of the first time he met Van; hiding in the bushes eyeing his motorcycle. He thought about being out on the lake with him; how it felt to play around, splashing each other. He remembered what it felt like to kiss his wet lips, and touch his damp body. 

Daryl's head was hurting; he had cried so hard, he was having trouble breathing, and his eyes were heavy. He took one last drag of his smoke, extinguished it and went inside to go to bed.

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Daryl woke at one o'clock in the afternoon. His sleep had been dreamless, thank God, but he still felt like shit. Reaching over to the bedside table, he grabbed his phone; hoping for a missed call or message from Van. There were five missed calls and two messages, but none of them from the person he wanted to hear from most.

Sasha had called twice and Morgan three times; they had each left one message. Sasha wanted to let him know that she had called Morgan and told him about the bust and the judge's decision. She stressed to him how much she cared for him and that if he wanted to talk, she was always there for him. 

The next message was from Morgan. He told Daryl how happy he was that they got Martinez, but was sorry to hear what had happened with Van. The police department had leased the house at the lake for two months, and Morgan told him that if he wanted to take some vacation time and stay at the lake, he would fill out the paperwork for him.

Daryl was grateful for the offer. It probably wasn't a wise decision, but he wasn't ready to go home yet. He still had hope that he could work things out with Van, and wasn't going to give up until Van told him he didn't love him anymore.

Eventually, Daryl got out of bed and made coffee. He thought about what he could do to get Van to forgive him. Even if Van never wanted to see him again, he wanted to be forgiven, although he didn't deserve it. 

Daryl called Morgan and accepted his offer. He would stay until the lease was up, which was another month. By that time, he and Van would either be back together, or will have said their final goodbyes. He wondered if he would see Van down at the dock, but he had probably missed him by sleeping late. 

He couldn't sit at that house all day wondering where Van was or what he was doing. Daryl was sure that whatever he was doing, Van wouldn't be sitting around moping like he was; Van would move on as fast as he could. Daryl wanted to try to explain himself before Van moved too far for him to reach.

Daryl threw on some clothes; a black button-down shirt and black jeans. He wanted to look nice, in hopes that it would help convince Van to take him back. He would start at Van's house; hopefully he would be home and willing to see him. Maybe they could take a walk, and Daryl would be able to convince Van that he loved him, and would never hurt him again.

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Daryl's heart was racing as he walked down the street. The closer he got to Van's house, the faster his breathing became. He could see the house in the distance, and ran various scenarios in his head; he wanted to be prepared to counter any argument or accusation Van would throw at him. 

He stood in front of the house, staring at it as if it were going to speak to him. Shaking his head to clear his mind, Daryl walked slowly through the grass and climbed the two steps that led to the door. He listened for a moment, but didn't hear any voices. He knocked gently on the screen door, and waited to see what would happen.

No one acknowledged his knock, but soon a man in a wheelchair appeared on the other side of the door. "Who the hell are you?""

"I'm sorry to bother you. My name is Daryl Dixon; I'm leasing your old house. We met last week at movie night."

"Oh yeah, I remember you. What the hell do you want?"

"Is Van here? I need to speak to him; it's important."

Richard arched his eyebrow at Daryl. "What could possibly be so important that you need him for it?"

Daryl cleared his throat. "Um, is he here? I really need to talk to him."

Richard looked Daryl over. He didn't like the looks of the stranger at his door, but suspected that this was the friend Van had been spending all his time with. "Come in, Daryl. We should talk."

"If he's not here, then I'll see him around, I'm sure."

"Just get your ass in my house; I got something to say to you." Richard turned his wheelchair around and rolled back into the depths of the house. Daryl passed the threshold and steeled himself for whatever this prick had to say.

"You the one that's been keeping that little shit away from home so much? I don't want you hanging out with him anymore. His responsibilities are here, and he's never here to take care of what he needs to."

Daryl was livid. He had probably lost Van forever, and currently did not have one fuck left to give for this asshole.

"He does everything for you. He cooks for you, cleans your nasty ass clothes, and takes you everywhere you want to go. He probably gives you sponge baths and reads you goddamn bedtime stories too. And you have no respect for him."

"He gave up college for you, a scholarship, and his own fucking life to take care of you, and all you do is call him a little shit and tell him he's not good enough. Well let me tell you something, you crippled bastard, your son is the best human being I've ever known."

Daryl turned and stomped back to the front door, stopping briefly before walking out. "You tell him I was here, and if he wants to talk to me, he knows where to find me."

**************************************************************************************************************************************

Daryl sat at his kitchen table, a Salisbury steak frozen dinner in front of him and a beer in his hand. He could see the sun setting from where he sat and wondered if Van had ever made it home. He worried that Van may have done something to himself in anger, and Daryl would never forgive himself for it. 

After he ate, he took his smokes and his sketchbook and went out to the porch. The moon had fully risen by then and was reflecting off the lake. It caused Daryl to think about the night Van had almost drown; the night his own life could have ended, and the first night they spent together. 

He was sketching the lake, and not paying attention to anything else around him, when he heard footsteps on the dock. Looking out, he saw Van standing at the edge with his back toward Daryl. He wanted to run to him, wrap his arms around him, and kiss him senseless, but didn't. Daryl sat in his chair and watched him.

Van was not dressed for a swim. He was wearing a pair of jeans and a white button-down shirt. He stood perfectly still, looking out at the moonlit lake. After a few minutes, he turned around and headed up toward the house. Daryl watched him get closer, and was scared of what Van might say.

"Hey, Daryl."

"Van, I didn't think you'd want to see me."

Van sat in the chair next to Daryl. "My dad told me you came by; I didn't think you'd want to see me either."

Daryl hung his head. "The thought of never seeing you again kills me. I just wanted to talk to you; don't expect you to want to listen, but I just want you to know how much I love you, and how sorry I am that I hurt you."

Van sighed. "When I got home this morning, I couldn't sleep. I spent all night thinking about the things you said, and what happened. I want to apologize. I know we never talked about Flip and Jason, and there's something I never told you." Van took a deep breath and hoped that what he was about to say, would be enough for Daryl to forgive him for his outburst the night before.

"I never considered either of them to be my friend. I hung out with them, because they were willing to hang out with me. Nobody else would after my mom left and took everything we had. I didn't have any loyalty to them, not really. They weren't like real friends; people to talk to or share things with."

He looked Daryl in the eye. "If you had been honest with me and told me what you were doing, I would have told you anything you needed to know about them; the things they did. If I knew I was making a choice, I would choose you; every time. You are everything I ever wanted, Daryl; everything I ever needed. You were my chance to start over again; my chance to get away from my dad and start my life."

Daryl opened his mouth to speak, but Van kept going. "I fucked up just as much as you think you did, but I didn't know. I wish I could go back and tell you that those assholes didn't mean shit to me. I would have helped you as much as I could. I know you love me, and I hope you know that I love you. Despite all the horrible things I said to you last night."

"I can't lose you, Daryl. I didn't think I'd find somebody who I can talk to and be with,that wanted the same thing with me. I won't give you up; I won't let you go back to wherever you live without you knowing how sorry I am for reacting the way I did. I did it without thinking, but now that I've had some time, I know you kept everything from me because you had to. You didn't want to compromise the investigation, and I can understand and respect that. You're a good cop, Daryl."

Daryl's mouth was hanging slightly open. He did not expect this; he was prepared for an onslaught of anger and rage, not apologies and regret. He stood up and pulled Van to his feet. 

"You had every right to react that way. I don't deserve to hold you, or kiss you again. I would understand if you can't forgive me for not telling you what was going on, but I don't want to lose you. I would you do anything if you could forgive me and take me back."

"I think we want the same thing, Daryl." Van leaned forward and pressed his lips against Daryl's. "I don't think there's anything left to say. We love each other, we want to be together, and we forgive each other. Will you fuck me now?"

Daryl snickered, winding his arms around Van's waist. "I will fuck you through the goddamn mattress, baby." Daryl kissed him hard, and backed him up through the doorway, and into the kitchen. They were undressing each other in a frenzy and trying to make their way to the bedroom without tripping over each other.

They were clad only in their boxer briefs by the time Daryl pushed Van onto the mattress. He kissed his way down Van's body to the waistband of his shorts. He looked up at the other man as he pulled Van's underwear down with his teeth.

"Holy hell, Daryl." Van exclaimed and threw his head back. Once he was completely naked, Daryl stood and peeled off his own boxers. Walking over to the dresser, he took out the bottle of lube and popped the top.

Van looked up at him with the most beautiful, lust-filled eyes he had ever seen. Daryl fell to his knees and licked the tip of Van's cock. "Fuck, please don't tease me, Daryl. I need you inside me."

Daryl lifted his head and kissed Van's slit. "Anything you want, baby. I gotta get you ready."

Daryl squirted lube on his middle and index fingers and pushed them slowly into Van. He squirmed a little, but relaxed and allowed Daryl's fingers to slide in and out of him. 

"I never thought I'd feel this again," Van moaned. 

Daryl shushed him. "I always want to make you feel like this, Van. You're the love of my life, and I will never do anything to risk losing you again."

He moved his fingers in a scissoring motion, stretching Van as much as he could. The man lay still on the bed, only moving his hips in time with Daryl's fingers. Stretching his arms above his head, Van, again, begged Daryl to stop teasing and fuck him.

Daryl removed his fingers and slicked up his dick. Hovering over his lover, he kissed him as he slid his cock inside.

Van ran his hands down Daryl's back, and held him as closely as he could. Daryl's pace was slow and leisurely; he wanted to take his time and enjoy making love to his boyfriend. They moved together slowly, methodically; kissing each other lazily and touching every inch of each other.

Daryl sat up and took Vans cock in his hand; stroking it in time with the sway of his hips. "You are fucking gorgeous, baby," he said as Van's body began to writhe on the bed.

"Harder, Daryl. Please, fuck me harder." Van was desperate to cum; the pressure in is balls was almost unbearable, and he was shaking with need.

"Touch yourself," Daryl told him and let go of Van's cock. He leaned over the man, taking his wrists and pinning them above his head. His hips moved faster and harder, snapping with every thrust. "Cum for me Van. God please, cum for me."

Both men were moaning and grunting; their voices echoing off the walls of the bedroom. Van came with a roar, spilling over onto himself and Daryl, who soon followed him over the cliff. Daryl kissed Van as he poured inside him; the ecstasy from his orgasm overflowing from his lips.

Breathing heavily, Daryl pulled out of his lover and rolled onto his back. Van moved on his side and Daryl wrapped his arms around him.

"Thank you, for coming back to me," he whispered into Van's neck.

"Thank you for wanting me back," Van replied.

"I'm gonna make sure nothing like that happens again. I promise." Daryl pulled Van closer and snuggled the man deeper into his chest.

"I know, Daryl. We're gonna fight again, but we're a part of each other; we'll always find our way back."

They laid in silence for a while, before Daryl remembered something important.

"Did your dad tell you everything I said?"

"Yep," Van said.

"I hope he wasn't too much of an asshole about it."

Van turned in Daryl's arms and ran his thumb across Daryl's cheek. "The first thing he said to me was that he loved me, and he was sorry he treated me like shit. I thought he'd had a stroke,” he said, laughing.

"He admitted he was an asshole, and told me that he appreciated everything I do for him; said I deserve to be happy and start my own life. Then he told me you came by looking for me; wanted to talk to me."

"He told me to find you and listen to what you had to say. He could see that you cared about me and I didn't need to let a friend like you go."

Daryl was shocked that his words had sunk into the old man's head. "I am so happy for you, baby. Did you tell him we're more than just friends?"

Van laughed. "Oh, hell no, but I think he would be okay with it now. I just want to give him some time; make sure he meant what he said."

Daryl hummed in agreement and laid Van's head on his chest. They didn't say another word to each other, just laid in each other's arms until they fell asleep.


	15. Happily Ever After

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Six months later. What are our boys up to?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who read, left kudos and comments, and bookmarked this little story. I love you all and appreciate all the love and support.  
> Special thanks to jsmith69 for the idea for this one. I love you dear, and am working on another special pairing to be posted in the near future.  
> I will be taking some time off to prepare my new story, but have eleven one-shots and "Part Two's" that will hopefully keep everyone satisfied in the meantime.  
> Leave a comment; let me know what you think.

Chapter Fifteen- Happily Ever After

 

Van parked his motorcycle under the carport, next to Daryl's. He had good news and couldn't wait to share it with his boyfriend. 

Daryl had been home all day, working on some rewrites for his publisher. Van had finally convinced him to send out a manuscript, and out of ten publishers he had sent it to, only one had offered to publish it. 

The door was unlocked, so Van let himself into the home the two men now shared. The first thing he had done after hauling all his belongings to the next county, was apply to college. Daryl's house was a twenty-minute drive from campus, and he hoped that Van would send in his application; even if he decided to live on campus, they would be able to see each other every day. 

Van decided he'd rather not live on campus; Daryl's house was only a twenty-minute drive, and he couldn't stand the thought of being away from Daryl for even one night. Daryl felt the same, and was excited to live with his boyfriend.

"Daryl, sweetheart. Where are you?" Van yelled as he closed the front door.

"I'm in the bedroom," Daryl yelled back, and Van made a beeline to the back of the house.

Daryl was wearing a pair of red boxer shorts and searching through his dresser drawers. Van stood behind him and wrapped his arms around him. 

"I missed you so much today. I wish you could have been there to see me," Van said and kissed Daryl's bare shoulder.

"You know try-outs are private; they wouldn't have let me anywhere near the pool," he replied.

Van had received a partial athletic scholarship, but was still required to participate in swim team try-outs. It was only a formality, but Van enjoyed it. It felt good to compete again, even if it wasn't for glory. Van's heart leapt in his chest when the coach welcomed him to the team; it was a given that he would be a member of the university swim team, but hearing the praise of his new coach gave him joy that was rivaled only by Daryl's love.

"I know, but coach said he was real proud to have me on the team and expected me to brake some records this year."

Daryl turned in his arms. "I'm not going to miss any of your swim meets. I'm gonna be in the stands screaming and cheering you on. I'm proud of you too; you can do anything you set your mind to, and I don't want to miss a moment of it."

Daryl leaned in and kissed his boyfriend sweetly, caressing his shoulders and rubbing circles on his skin. 

When they broke the kiss, Van sat on the edge of their bed and watched Daryl go back to searching through his dresser. "How are the re-writes coming?"

Daryl sighed loudly. "Ugh! Everything was going fine, and then I spent an hour re-reading the same sentence. I know it doesn't sound right, but I can't think of any other words; they're just not coming to me. I thought I'd take a break; maybe a hot shower can clear my head."

Van grabbed Daryl by the waistband of his shorts, turned him around and pulled him forward. "I could come to you; would that help?"

Daryl snickered. "It would certainly get my mind off the story, that's for sure." 

Van looked up at Daryl as he pulled his boxers down to expose his delicious cock. Taking it in his hand, he licked the tip, then wrapped his lips around it. Daryl leaned his head back and moaned. His mind was already clearing; Van's mouth the only thing he was focused on. 

The only thing about a clear mind is, sometimes distracting thoughts pop in uninvited. 

"Fuck me," Daryl moaned. Van took that as a cue and began to hum and suck around the hardening cock in his mouth.

"No, wait Van. Stop, just for a minute. I forgot to tell you something."

Van slid off his boyfriend's dick and looked up at him curiously. What could be so important that Daryl would feel the need to interrupt a blow job?

"What is it? Did something happen?"

"You got a letter in the mail." Daryl told him and caressed Van's cheek with his fingers.

Van shook his head and grinned. "I can read it later. This is way more important."

"No, you should read it now; it's from your dad."

Van and his father had kept in touch with each other since he moved away. One phone call a week, like clockwork. The conversations were always short; Richard wanted to make sure Van was happy and healthy, and that Daryl was taking care of him. The thought that his father had something to say that he could only tell him in a letter, kinda freaked Van out.

Daryl pulled his boxer briefs back up and went to his writing desk in the corner of the room. Van took the letter from him and opened it without a second thought. He was afraid his dad was sending bad news, and he would have to put his life on hold again.

Daryl climbed on the bed behind Van, wrapped his arms around him, and laid his head on Van's back. He felt every movement of Van's chest, and every hitch in his breath. He was as quiet and as still as he could be, trying to show Van that he was here for him if he was needed, but wasn't going to overstep his boundaries if Van needed to be alone.

When Van was finished reading the letter, he sat it on the bed next to him, and sighed. "Wow, that wasn't what I was expecting." 

"Is that good or bad?" Daryl asked, tightening his arms around his boyfriend.

"It's good; it's all good. You're not going to believe this." Van broke out of Daryl's grip and turned to face him. "Someone bought the house. She's dad's age and she's a physical therapist. Dad said he met her on movie night at Paul and Marge's house. They started talking, and she offered to help him out. She's been coming by a few days a week working with his legs, taking him places and teaching him to cook."

Daryl's eyes were wide with disbelief. "Is she doing this of her own free will?"

"Yeah; they've gone out to dinner three times. He says he's in love with her."

Daryl laid back on the bed and smiled. "That's amazing. I'm happy for him. Maybe you can go back next weekend, before classes start, and meet her."

"I'll give him a call tonight, see if next weekend is good for him. Will you come with me?"

"If you want me to; I'd go anywhere with you." Daryl said, and pulled Van on top of him. "I could still use a distraction, if you're interested."

Van blushed, and buried his face in Daryl's neck. "I love distracting you."

He sat up and climbed off the bed, allowing Daryl to get up and turn on the shower. He stripped as he followed his boyfriend into the bathroom and was completely naked by the time Daryl turned around.

"God, you are beautiful, baby." Daryl pushed his boxers down his legs and stepped into the shower, holding his hand out for Van, to help him step inside.

Daryl pulled him under the spray, and kissed him passionately as the water rained down on them. Their hands roamed each other's bodies, and they ground their hard cocks together. Their moans echoed off the tile walls, and they lost themselves in each other.

Van's back hit the wall, and suddenly he was swept up in Daryl's arms; his legs locked around the other man's waist. "Can't get enough of you, Van. You drive me fucking crazy, baby." Daryl said as he licked and sucked on Van's neck and chest.

"Fuck me, Daryl. Fuck me the way I like it; pound me into the wall." Van whined and begged for Daryl's cock.

"I will, baby. You know I will." Daryl pushed his hard, leaking shaft inside his lover's eager hole. Van gasped loudly at the anticipated intrusion and wrapped his arms around Daryl's neck.

Breathing heavily into Daryl's neck, Van thrust as best as he could to meet Daryl's hips. They were surrounded by the sound of their bodies slamming together and Daryl was having a hard time holding Van.

Van's legs were shaking as Daryl pulled out and sat him on his feet. "Turn around," he told Van, and he held the man by the hips to steady him. "Put your arms around me and hold on. I'm gonna fuck you through this wall."

Van reached behind him and secured his arms around Daryl's neck. When he pushed in, Daryl held him tight against him and fulfilled his promise. Van's cock remained untouched, but he didn't care. He was certain he would be cumming soon regardless.

Daryl's thrusts were becoming frantic; slamming Van's chest into the tile with every snap of his hips. Van was quickly going hoarse from screaming Daryl's name as he exploded, his arms tightening around his lover's neck and pulling them both forward. Daryl's hold on Van laxed as the man's body shook in his arms; his own orgasm ripping through him at the same time.

Daryl clung to Van's dripping body as they regained their composure; their breathing and heart rate slowly returning to normal. "Fuck me, Daryl. That was. . . . shit, amazing doesn't even begin to cover it."

"Agreed," Daryl said breathlessly. "There's no better feeling in the world than being inside you."

Van turned around to face Daryl and kissed him hard. "Water's getting cold; we should wash up and get out before we freeze."

Back in the bedroom, Daryl finally decided what to wear. A long sleeve white button down shirt, and black dress pants.

"You got a hot date tonight?" Van asked jokingly.

"As a matter of fact, I do." Daryl replied. "I arranged a little dinner party for my boyfriend; I love him more than anything in the world, and I want him to know how proud I am of him."

Van smiled. "I'm sure he knows."

"I hope so, but I enjoy showing him. I invited Sasha, her boyfriend, Abe, Morgan and his wife. I hope you don't mind. I made reservations at that Tai place you like."

"I don't mind at all. I like Sasha and Morgan, but you have to promise me one thing."

Daryl sat on the bed next to Van and rubbed his thigh. "Anything you want."

"I get to eat your cock for dessert."

Daryl kissed him deeply. "That is always a promise, baby."

 

The End


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